Dewdrops accompany me as I wait for u..

Hurt.Misunderstood.

2005-04-29T16:22:00.000-07:00

SUCH A BIG MISUNDERSTANDING.I SHUD HAV PUT DOWN THE SURNAME LOR.NOW SUM1 HAS MISUNDERSTOOD.DO U THINK I ONLY NOE 1 JOLENE IN MY LIFE?wahlao..n this misunderstanding has caused so much pain 2 my dear friend..well..since she says so..i guess..we're no longer friends...so i was realli shocked...i thot she sent me the letter it's bout me controlling her n hu she wans 2 b wif..but it's bout my blog..WHAT THE HECK.N SHE DOESNT EVEN NOE TT IT'S NOT HER IM TOKIN BOUT.Cant the jolene come frm fairfield..wahlao.wahlao.wahlao.SHIT LA.fine lor..so mayb she's happier to let go.i guess im putting 2 much pressure on her like she sed.fine lor.fine lor.it's ok.I SO LOVE 2 B HURT.i go to skool..n she thrusts me a letter stating tt evrythin's over.if it's bout me being too possessive over her.i understand..but it's bout my blog post.WHAT THE HECK.WHAT THE FCUKING HECK!!!!!!!!!!!Im so irritated..I JUST LOVE 2 B HURT.yea..not by her..but by evry1.I've formally decided..at the end of this yer..afetr i prove evry1 tt i can do well..im gonna commit suicide.seriously.This isnt a joke.so im trying 2 b friendlier 2 evry1 now.so i wont hav any more regrets..im tyrin 2 forget all the unhappiness so tt i can die happily.seriously..im not bluffing u.i really will die.on my own.it's like during recess..i was so depressed..i felt tt my life wasnt worth living..y does God wan 2 bring me 2 this world if all he gives me is hurt n pain?n it's not bcos of u.so stop inflicting pain can.if u keep doin it.im gonna get stressed n i may wanna die earlier than end of the yer.so stop it.plz stop it now.stop inflicting pain on urself.ur inflicting more pain on me.ok.stop it.so why must pple be so quick at misunderstanding?WHAT THE HECK.Lemme explain to u here.on this blog.I wasnt angry wif u.I wasnt tokin bout u.HAPPY??Then out of the blue..u just tell me not to be friends..Well..im nto gonna cry..im supposed 2 live life happily so i can go in peace rite.yep.so plz la.im not bluffing u.u just misunderstood.u arent the only jolene in my life.i hav met so many jolenes..same spelling.WHAT THE HECK LA.fine..i wont b stressed by this no longer.im not gonna b so silly.i havent thot of how 2 c.s..but im still thinkin..just hope God will make it ezier 4 me..let me die in my sleep..tt'll b gr8..so stop askin me if im ok..i AM OK..OKay??yep.right now.success is my first priority..nothin else.so fine la..if u wan it 2 b this way...i wont argue..ill oblige..okays.

*Life isnt worth living for.There's no bright side of life at all.All I see is darkness and blood.*

haiz.

2005-04-27T17:41:00.000-07:00

im gonna chnge blog..again:Pim puttin the link on ma tagboard..so b sure 2 c it..the new blog will b more cheerful i hope..n it's creative i guess...well 2 me anywaex..hahs..zi kua..but i think it's nice..hahas...my blog templates r neva original..do u realise how i foreva change blog temp n music?well..ill try not to..n i m still tryin 2 forget HER...i just cant..i cant stop myself frm noticing..:(...i wish i could forget her..but i dunno how 2...this fri there's listenin compre..n im so afraid of gettin BETA record..for TAF..im gonna run evryday!:(o well..still have d n t n those few chaps for geog n a lil on hist..n i think im done..yep..sci is ok la..still revising..ate chicken chop after skool...YAY!..hahs..i dunno y..i hate myself for this..but sumtiems i get damn sad n jealous wen i c m ybest friends wif others..n especially wen tt friend just drags my friend away....i dunno....im better off not to be with very popular pple..tt's the case wif me n HER..we'll just remain gud pals..haiz.haiz.HAIZ!!...be sure 2 link 2 my new blog..soz 4 the trouble:P...tt blog shud b permanent..i promise!!like my email..i havent changed it..c..:P..life is still lonely 4 me..but i guess it's ok..lucky 2 hav pple like constance(nu er)n xueyi(mummy)in my class..without them..haiz..cant imagine life without them..tt's all..cya at my new blog..will b muvin evrythin there..including my tagboard:)so goody!..

Sorry

2005-04-26T19:07:00.000-07:00

Hmm..sorry..my posts..r so harsh n terrible..sorry..i was just too angry to care..i dunno..well it's better tt i pour it all out here than with my friends rite?hmm..so lemme share stuff tt i din bother 2 share cos i was too bz grumbling..hahs.2day i suddenly had 2 new "family" members..constance n xueyi..hahas..cos we were playing ball during pe after takin ht n wt..yep..n i dunno y..i got crazy..then i treated the ball as my BABY..then after tt..kesia throw the ball 2 others..then all throw here throw there..then i fake mad..cos my BABY got abused..hahs..then it was so funny..i was trying to snatch the ball frm xueyi..constance was laughing..i was laughing 2..then xueyi oso la..then i perspired lots..hahas...my ht is 147..wt is 44.6...hrumph..cant get out of TAF..irritatin...n my chem paper..only got 12/20..such a terrible mark..n last night..i ate wafer with maple syrup n butter..with a sausage..with ham...with scrambled eggs..yummy leh....i dun mind eating it evryday..my dad bought it frm spore poly..the food there damn cheap..tt 1 is $2..n the bks tehre r very very very nice 2 read..so interesting..books like brand new 2..unlike sjc bks..hmm..then yesterday oso gt bak the compre..bout earthsong..i got 23/25!!lalalalalalalallalaa..happy la..:P..n any1 noes where i can find beautiful but sad midis?plz tell me..i wan add more midis rather than songs..n shud i change my blog?dew-drop..dew-drop..sounds weird la..o well..n i dun think i can ever forgive HER anymore....i've forgiven her for like..so many times?i cant do it anymore...i realli cant..n i nevr will..she'll probably at most just remain my gud friend..n the most ill do is say hi to her..tt's all...she's not exactly my best friend anywaex..she alredy has 1 close friend in the same class s her..n tt time she even cried wen her tt best friend ignored her...but wen i did..she din bother..so frm tt i noe tt she's definitely not my best friend..my grandma n my younger godsis..r..hahs..weird combination of best friends..ahma n meimei..:P.i have been studyin la..studyin geog(9 more chaps:'()..then im not prepared 4 hist...n sci well..ok i guess...we're doin a retest on this fri...it's chem.....sumthin bout particles again..i dun like particles la..i prefer the 1 bout atoms oso..but is bout protons,neutrons,electrons..yep..very interesting..n bio..so many things 2 rem..n MR LIM KEE TIONG..still hasnt given bak our enzymes paper..wahlao eh..i wan study lor..c wat mistakes i made..then he dun giv bak..!@#$^%^&*$&&!@hahs..n we had ting xie 2day for chi..mr sim is the only teacher i think hu can control our class..2 endurance..can keep us so so so quiet..other teachers..no matter how they threaten us..for example ms lcl..we dun giv a damn botu them..hahs..im serious..i wish i could hav a long fone call wif yanhan n lisais..but lisais says the calls r expensive..$5 per min..omg...........$5 can buy awesome food leh..then 1 min only use up $5..SO EX MAN...n sum pple r very irritating..in the sense tt wen i tok 2 my fren..they jus drag them away..so annoying...my life has been terrible..constantly terrible..i dunno how 2 describe it..words just cant describe it..c it's tt terrible..hav u heard the song 'lonely' by akon..i luv it leh..v. cute..last night..listened to my mp3s on my mp3 player...got 31 songs in it..2 bad cant bring it 2 skool...skool life sucks s usual..but p.e rocks cos we dun hav 2 run n run n run n run n RUN!!...lucky..can just hav fun........tt's all la...take care.n hope i dun get provoked..or ill really explode!c it rhymes..n there's 1 darn irritaitng girl in our class..i hate her lor..seeing her..just makes me irritated alredy..hrumph...tt's all.sayonara.

sorrows n more sorrows evryday...

2005-04-26T14:23:00.000-07:00

I really wonder..do u noe the feeling of walking to skool alone?of tokin 2 pple..but they alredy hav their own cliques n u r out of theirs?wen u hav no1 to tok 2..or cry 2?wen evry1's afraid 2 c u cry?wen no1 is there to lend u her ear or shoulder?wen ur so-called best friends r not true n r always breaking promises?wen ur results r dropping..n u seem to be dropping..even in the worst express class?wen u c pple takin back their papers happily while ur left alone feeling down?wen u desperately need 2 cry but cant?wen u r feelin depressed evryday..n r sick of it?wen ur teacher doesnt even tell u in advance wen a test is comin?wen u did not do well in ur fav subject?wen ur n expert in tt sub..but u actually barely passed?wen evrybody just acts like they hate u?wen u r forever in the TAF club?wen u r just sick of life..n just wanna rest for once without any1 telling u wat 2 do?wen evrything just goes wrong 4 u..n u start 2 believe tt ur realli dumb??wen u r just plain dumb?wen no1 ever comforts u n reassures u tt they'll b there 4 u?wen ur so-called best friend just wants to hang up on u?wen ur other so-called best friend constantly breaks ur heart?wen u just feel tt ur carrying a heavy burden in ur heart..n u wish u were like ur past self..very cheerful with no worries whatsoever?when ur so-called best friend tells u all tt rubbish sweet talk n just is a very terrible friend?evrythin tt i've sed here happens to me..evryday..n i m darn tired..n SICK OF VERYTHIN N EVRY1!!!!i nevr get accepted in2 any grp..im always one of those tt pple wouldnt ask to team up wif them...my chem marks r dropping..i feel like im 1 of the bottom..n in a worst express class...y m i so STUPID?i thot i used 2 b smarter...y???oh y..as i grow older i get dumber n dumber N DUMBER??????y??????y r there foreva so many 'downs' in my life?i nevr get 2 xperience true happiness....oh boy..i hav an awful headache.......too many things r bothering me...JUST LEAVE ME ALONE.I DUN NEED ANYONE.depression is realli overwhelming..do u noe?well since u dun..JUST GO AWAY.

SHUT UP

2005-04-25T16:48:00.000-07:00

REALLI PISSED OFF..REALLI FED UP.......I TELL U..IM THE KIND OF PERSON HU'S EZLY OFFENDED...I MAY LOOK LIKE A CUTE LITTLE PLAYTHING..WHO IS EZ TO MAKE FUN OF..................WELL...IM BACK TO MYSELF..REM HOW I TOLD U BOUT MY MEL NO. 3?WELL..IM BACK AGAIN..ME..THE ANGRY..FRUSTRATED SELF....N I ABSOLUTELY HATE EVRY1.....I REALLI DUN THINK I HAVE ANY TRUE FRIENDS IN SJC............I MIGHT AS WELL STAY A LONER...I REALLI DUN CARE ANYMORE..I'VE BEEN TOLERATING A LONG TIME NOW..IM GONNA LET IT ALL OUT HERE...DO U NOE HOW IT FEELS..WEN U NEED TO TALK TO SUMBODY ABOUT STUFF..N THEY R NEVR THERE?ESPECIALLY IF THE 'THEY' IS UR BEST FRIENDS..SO-CALLED BEST FRIENDS ANYWAY...THEY DUN EVEN TAKE TIME 2 UNDERSTAND ME..DUN EVEN TAKE TIME 2 CARE ABOUT HOW IM FEELING RIGHT NOW..FINE...FINE..FINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!IM GONNA LIVE LIFE AS A LONER..FINE..NO1 EVER CARES ABOUT ME ANYWAY..I CANT STAND IT ANY LONGER..I'VE BEEN TOLERATING THIS FOR LIKE..WHAT?1 YEAR ALREDY...I'M SO IRRITATED...U DUN EVEN TREAT ME AS A FRIEND..BOTH OF U..U NEVR DO..N IM NOT TT LITTLE CHEERFUL GIRL HU IS MADE USE OF..N WHOM U CAN BREAK PROMISES..IM NOT SUM1 U CAN JUST PLAY WITH..HEY..I HAVE MY PRIDE TOO..I HAVE MY DIGNITY..IM NOT SUM1 HU CAN BE HURT SO MANY TIMES..IM NOT SUM1 HU CAN JUST FORGIVE ALL THE TIME U DO THOSE STUFF TO ME..IT'S REALLI HURTFUL..DO U NOE?SO MANY PROMISES..BUT U NEVER KEEP THEM..U NEVER EVE NTALK TO ME ABOUT STUFF..N DONT EVEN LEND A LISTENING EAR.....ISNT THAT WHAT FRIENDS ARE SUPPOSED 2 DO?LISTEN?IM DARN ANNOYED NOW AT THE WAY IM BEING TREATED BY 2 OF MY SO-CALLED BEST FRIENDS..HU I'VE ALWAYS THOT WELL OF..............I CANT STAND THEM ANY LONGER...WHY DONT WE JUST END IT?EVERYONE WILL BE FREED OF SO MUCH MORE HURT..I WILL BE FREED..EVERYONE WILL B HAPPIER..NO ONE WILL GET ANGRY WITH EACH OTHER ANYMORE..ANYWAY..U..IM TOKIN 2 BOTH OF U..C N J..IM SO FED UP..SO IRRITATED..I JUST FEEL LIKE SCREAMING AT U...WELL..I CANT BOTHER 2 DO SO...ANYWAY..BOTH OF U..HAV SO MANY WONDERFUL FRIENDS..SO MANY FRIENDS FRM NPCC..WELL..GUD FOR U THEN..IM NOT PART OF UR WIDE FRIENDSHIP CIRCLE ANYMORE...IM BEING USED..N I SHOULD HAVE LEFT LONG AGO...I DUN CARE..EVEN IF IM LEFT ALL ALONE WITHOUT U..I WILL NO LONGER BE UR FRIEND...I HAVE NO FRIENDS ANYWAY..WEIXIN HAS CHIU JIE..U ALL HAVE UR NPCC FRIENDS..LORAINE HAS HER GREAT PALS..HAS CAROLINE...EVRY1 HAS THEIR CLIQUES..WELL..I GUESS IM NOTHING..I MIGHT AS WELL JUST SHUT MYSELF OUT OF THIS WORLD....SO IRRITATING....I HONESTLY..FEEL LIKE SHIFTING OUTTA THIS SKOOL..EVRYTHING JUST IRRITATES ME..N I HAVE NO FRIENDS..NOBODY..NOBODY I CAN RELY ON..NOBODY WHO CAN WALK BESIDE ME..NOBODY HU CAN TOK 2 ME..NOBODY HU WILL LISTEN 2 ME...NOBODY HU WILL SHARE STUFF WITH ME..NOBODY WHO WILL ACCEPT ME FOR HU I M..NOBODY HU WILL STOP HURTING..NOBODY HU WILL STOP USING ME!!IM SO FED UP!!!!!!LIFE IS TERRIBLE...........I CANT LIVE IT ANYMORE..AT LEAST..I WONT BE ABLE TO LIVE IT..I GET SO STRESSED UP..PPLE R MAKING USE OF ME..THERE'S THE SAYING THAT THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE THINKING OF U...WELL..I CANT EXPECT ANY1 TO THINK OF ME..EVRY1 HAS THEIR OWN FRIENDS..OWN GRPS..IM JUST A NOBODY..NOBODY IS ME.......MY INNER SOUL..FEELS LIKE DYING NOW..I HAVE NO WILL 2 LIVE..WAT CAN I LIVE FOR?NOTHING!ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!I HAVE NOTHING TO BE HAPPY OF..EVEN IF I DO WELL..N I GET A GUD JOB IN FUTURE..DO I HAV FRIENDS?NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!No!!!!!!NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..I DUN HAV ANY LOVE FRM ANY1....MY HEART HAS BEEN CARRYING THIS BURDER FOR A LONG TIME....IM GONNA BREAK DOWN.....................................I CANT STAND IT..EVRY1 JUST DISLIKES ME..THE WHOLE WORLD HATES ME..THE WHOLE OF SINGAPORE ANYWAEX..I DUN HAVE ANY1 WHOM I CAN HUG FOR A LONG TIME N CRY TO..TO POUR ALL MY SORROWS..TO..NO1 HU TREASURES ME..EVRY1 JUST TAKES ME FOR GRANTED..I SERIOUSLY..DUN FEEL LIKE LIVING..ANYMORE..THERE';S NOTHING WORTH 2 LIVE FOR..THO I DUN OWE ANY1 A LIVING..N I MUST LIVE FOR MYSELF....I FIND LIFE SO MEANINGLESS..I DUN HAV A SINGLE TRUE FRIEND BESIDE ME........N THOSE SWEET TALKS WERE NOT REAL...I SHOULD JUST THROW AWAY THOSE LETTERS BOTH OF U WROTE TO ME..ESPECIALLY THE PERSON I ALWAYS THOT MY BEST FRIEND..WHY M I STILL HOLDING ON TO THEM?THEY'RE RUBBISH..THEY'RE FAKE..FULL OF UNTRUTH..FULL OF LIES...STOP LYING TO ME..I HATE IT!N IM GONNA END THIS POST...N I DUN NEED 2 GIV U A REASON FOR IT.I DUN NEED U.GO AWAY...DUN TOK 2 ME..IM JUST A PEST IN EVRY1'S EYE..IM JUST ANOTHER IDIOTIC HUMAN BEING...WHO SHUDNT HAVE BEEN BORN INTO THIS WORLD.I SHUDNT EXIST.I REALLI SHUDNT....WHY SHUD I?IF ALL I GET IS PAIN N MORE N MORE HURT?N WEN I DUN SEEM TO BE ABLE TO GIV PPLE HAPPINESS?TELL ME..WHY SHUD I LIVE..IM SO STUPID..I HAVE NO BRAINS...EVEN MY MUM SAYS SO..I HAVE NO FRIENDS..I M ALL ALONE....SO STAY AWAY FRM ME...COS IM A VERY TERRIBLE PERSON..N I HATE U.TT'S ALL.

oh man...

2005-04-23T14:37:00.000-07:00

today's oral was terrible..i din speak very fluently for my reading passage thingy..n i definitely did badly 4 my conversation thing!i was 2 nervous..n i came 2 skool late..so i wasnt even prepared..just wen i came we had 2 go to the hall n wait to be tested 4 oral!!..evrythin happened too fast.:(it was about neighbours..so terrible..i was stuck at certain qns..my tester was the malay teacher..haiya..o well..it's all over..so let's not tok bout it.:)spent the time copying songs frm cd..:)songs tt r hard 2 download online..will update more soon.

-hyperactivity-

2005-04-22T21:32:00.000-07:00

So happy lah...i dunno y..but 2day on msn..toked a lot..n i think i was rather annoying..LOLS!!...i kept "nudging" pple..wahaha..then bow n bow..u noe the msnger 7..v. cool...can nudge pple..can nudge my laopo!!ahaha..2mrrw..got oral..scary la..only the conversation part..all my friends' blogs r so beautiful...lately..i dun think anythin can put me down or discourage me..cos im in my crazy mood..i really think im like anne frank..but i hav 3 personalities..No.1)the very stressed up n depressed type;gets ezly discouraged..(i was this for a long time)No.2)the hyper 1,may get a little 2 annoying at times..mostly smiling..n laughin..ezly amused..n can neva stop laughing..No.3)im the angry n frustrated 1..always getting pissed off ezly..can get unfriendly..n cold..feels left out..feels like dying..dun go near me!!..rite now im mel no.2..hehe..so annoy me s much s u can..b4 i get bak 2 my mel no. 1 or no. 3 1 day..n my mel no. 2 very lame..tt's wat i m these days..jus ask constance ull noe..managed to tok 2 so many pple on msn..rebekah..laopo..rachel braberry,sauyan,yanhan,lisais..constance..yep...toked to laopo n lisais the longest..jolene very funny...aiya..the msnger 7 realli spices life up..v. funny..i cant stop laughin....nxt wk gonna take wt. n ht. come..hu wan 2 jump wif me??b my guest.LOLS..i told u im crazy..1 moment..u c all my posts being so sad n depressing..n now u c my posts gettin so..now wads tt word..HAPPY!!:)hehe...hope more pple tag at my tagboard.....i even gained myself a niece!tt is kesia~:Dim da auntie!YAY..1 more family member..i wan b peck hoon's mei......haiz...i wan more family members leh!!lalala..but my laopo will always remain s my laopo..cos she rox n u rok 2..lalala I LOVE U WITH ALL MY HEART N SOUL..for now until we grow old..LOLS..i got many lame poems 2day...take care n sayonara.

"mathilda"

2005-04-21T21:21:00.000-07:00

Today..everyone's so nice to me...surprisingly...n as im typing this..the baby is crying..sumwhere frm outside there la...very noisy this baby..cry n cry..but i guess sum babies just want attention...was in a hyper mood..like wat yanhan sed..or was it lisais?LOLS..dunno..toked 2 many pple on msn..even to rebekah..my junior..she's now p6..we used 2 b busmates...;)..had pft..the 5 batteries test..here r my lousy results: STANDING BROAD JUMP-at first,145..later 164.. INCLINED PULL UP-ONLY 7..:( SHUTTLE RUN(could hav done better)-12 SIT UP-40(this 1 quite happi:D) SIT N REACH-39(ok la..)yep...then for the career thingy..i finally finally finally decided wat i wanna b...a...TEACHER!!i dunno wat subject tho..will c how...now im happier..cos i really wan 2 b a teacher...n mdm hasanah is nice..n i have my frenz,rachel braberry,khoo wei xin n there r so many other frenz..n nice pple..it's like i finally find where i belong..:)..yes..i sed i wanted 2 b a police(i can b so fickle-minded)..but i doubt i really would belong there..i would just feel the same there s wen im a doctor..so i made the rite decision 4 once..now i can c weixin for 1 period..HEHE..hu ask her my best fren?tt's y im so happi 2 c her..we ended anne frank txt 2day:D..then i think i realli share quite a lot of similarities with anne frank...dunno lahs...agnes told me she tagged at my tagboard...my taggy's down 4 a while i guess.....yea..n like i sed..i relly m in a hyper mood..wateva way u interpret it...i got mostly Cs AGAIN for my pft..so i got 18..n i get silver AGAIN..always the same la..haiya..y muz my 2.4 b so lousy..but luckily i passed..yay.:Dthen i wish i had a "jie"...i alredy hav 1..but i wan 1 more!lols..im greedy...so far i hav no problems whatsoever wif the teachers....i dun hate any of them now...ms judy low is ok now..ms lim ming kiat still rox..n ms chew hui leng..HAHA!do u noe?the shuttle run she's the teacher-in-charge..then she called me mathilda..AGAIN..ahaha..if u dunno..she was my geog teacher..i wish she would teach me again..she's really nice..n gud at teachin geog..mayb i look like a MATHILDA..HAHA..so funny..she's really funny..then mdm hasanah rox..her lessons arents dat borin..in my opinion..so far the most interesting n eziest subject is..CHEMISTRY!!cos really fun..we're learnin protons,neutrons,electrons,particles of matter all those stuff..very interesting....quite fun leh......i luv sci so much this yer..dunno y..i used 2 hate it..cos evrytime i got my paper bak..i always failed..n summore..failed quite terribly..so evrytime there's a paper..i always get so sian..lols..always c fail fail n more fail..sad la..the past few yers..i realli hated sci...cos 2 me..it was the most boring subject..but many things about me hav changed..like my food preferences..my moodswings..my cheerfulness..im not so cheerful anymore..im not like a lil girl..i think thru many "falls" i've learnt my lessons n grown up(at least a lil?)i relli hav gone thru a lot...im just happy tt i hav no family problems..n i even hav frenz hu care bout me...in 2e...i still detest a few pple..just a few...:D...the rest r realli nice...i put down the names of those i find nice but whom i used 2 think horribly of..k?k..dun b offended..plz..huiyan,sauyan(last time wen i was told 2 sit nxt 2 her,i got so scared..i dunno la..but she's really a nice person now..)hmm..tt's all la..yep..as 4 the pple i detest..i wont state..tt's all..i guess..yep..yep..n 2mrrw goin 2 stay bak 2 paint my 'wonderful' art masterpiece..LOLS..nah..nt wonderful..in fact it's terrible lookin..k....hope 2mrrw will b a gud day..cos it's fri.take care..god bless u..i luv u......:)

loneliness...

2005-04-20T04:44:00.000-07:00

so lonely..im so lonely..i hav nobody..im on my own..sounds familiar?tt's me...im really very lonely..im gonna cut my hair..muhaha..but i wont look like ms lee..i promise u...so dun worry..cos ms lee doesnt hav clips..i hav!wahaha..im so lonely la..it's like i walk to skool all alone..n i walk past pple..n i feel so awkward..tt's y i neva want to go to skool early..tho i can go to skool early...i feel so left out..sumtimes it gets so terrible..i just go to the library..hide in a corner..n cry my heart out..i noe i've been soundin like this for months..n i've been feelin this way..there's no cure..no1 to luv me..no1 hu will stay by my side..at least jolene has frenz 2 hang out wif..me?i hav no1..NO ONE AT ALL..no1 hu is concerned bout me..hu would ask me how i m if i din go to skool..no1 hu would call me..not jus 4 hw reasons...n my chinese is dropping...got so low for tt test..n wats worse is it'll b counted..so i really felt like cryin..evrytime wen it coems to history lesson..i get very very depressed...im always depressed..i hav no1 to rely on..im scared of makin frenz...cos im terrified of rejection..n i dunno hu to trust..hu is my true frenz anymore..i jus liv life s it is..evry1 just has their own cliques..im all alone..no lil grps..no cliques..no1 hu 4 once would like to tok 2 me or sit wif me..or walk wif me..i feel like n outcast...like a fish outta water..like a shadow looming in the dark..like a wandering spirit..wif no direction....no sunlight..there's always darkness in my life...i walk alone down this lonely road..n i feel damn lonely...i wan cry.take care for those hu even care bout me..n sayonara.hope i wont end up committing suicide one day.

LIFE SUX...

2005-04-19T16:45:00.000-07:00

life is really borin as usual..and no1 will ever seem to understand me...so far i really dunno any1 hu will actually wait 4 me...only 1 person..n she's overseas...tt is my godsista,lisais..no1 else..i feel so angry n frustrated s usual...i thot im happier these days.. so im wrong again..my same best friend has made me angry..wen i first stepped into skool..my mum wants me 2 cut my hair..but if i cut hair..can sum1 hu noes me tell me wat kinda hairstyle i shud cut?plz tell me...or ill look terrible..plz..if ur my fren...i really feel so despo..like i really need sum1 to love me evryday....i dunno y im liddat...it's like i cant even b left alone 4 a while...my friends..they're always always always walkin away with another group of friends..n im foreva left alone..my life is so miserable these days....i hav a premonition..tt my life will always b the same..n i noe tt no1 cares about me anymore......no1 eva wants to stay beside me..evry1 just goes away and leaves me all alone..n i get all moody..n wen i ask pple to do project..they REFUSE..n then later they will BEG me to do the project...o irritatin..evrybody just expects ME only ME..to get the job done while they can just sit around n shake their legs..SO FED UP...i dun think i hav a best friend..my so-called best friend whom i've been tokin bout..isnt a true 1..she's not the kind hu would wait 4 me..hu would walk with me..who would tok 2 me bout anythin..i saw her..2day..twice..before skool n after..well im not caring bout her anymore....n im just FED UP with so many pple..im so FED UP with bein a loner..i just feel so depressed...it's like...i never get to feel happy..truly happy...i always have those darn mood swings..I FEEL SO IRRITATED!!im gonna isolate myself frm the world.

:'(:'(:'(:"(-DEDICATED TO J,P n L

2005-04-17T13:26:00.000-07:00

OMG!!I FEEL SO TERRIBLE FOR MY THREE BEST FRIENDS!!they're all so sad over sumthin..n the worst thing is i dunno how 2 comfor them..n make them feel better..i feel so useless...those 3 best friends r J,P n L..u oe hu ritez...i wont say their names..but seein the first 2 makes my heart want 2 break..they mean a lot 2 me..both of them..seein their posts n seein their faces in skool..realli realli make me depressed...tt is y altho i've been in a gud mood...seein them ike that just makes me in a bad mood alredy...why must bad stuff happen 2 them?so..let me say a prayer 4 them here..since i cant do anythin much 2 help anywaex..
Dear Lord,
I pray that you'll help my best friends,who have been unhappy lately,to cheer up.Help them see the brighter side of things,and help them to face their many troubles with a smile.Help them to realise that the many obstacles are there not to weaken them,or that they just have a terrible life,but to help them to grow stronger.I pray that they will stay cheerful amidst all the unhappiness.With this prayer,I sincerely ask of your blessings that will be showered upon them.Thank you Lord.Amen.

haiz..just hope they c this post..n smile....haiz.........haiz........just to let them noe tt ill lways b there 4 them s their best friends..even tho i dunno how 2 express myself so well..take care...n sayonara.

survived...

2005-04-16T18:13:00.000-07:00

Yo!!Guess what?I survived 2.4 KM!!..n im using my dad's compaq laptop now..very cool la...luv it..:D..os my pc is spoilt..(gettin old..)2.4 was scary tho..lucky for clara,kesia,constance,jiejie n ah gong..if not 4 them..i would hve collapsed...clara was like ,"Go mel!!" n kesia was pushing me..wen i was about 2 giv up...constance was asking me 2 go on..jiejie n ahgong..they were cheering me on!!!!:)so happy...i have such gud friends:)then..my dad asked m to do sum clerical work...to look thru his students' marks n check if they were correct...n other stuff...kinda fun yet tiring....laopo din come 4 the run:(sad...i hope i din fail..i got the 74 th position..lousy lah...but i was seriously very sick....just felt terrible..felt like collapsing..luckily i didnt..n the mr chang was like ,"st. emilie,r u ok?" n asked me to stop if i wasnt feeling ok...i continued anywaex....tt's all..:)...take care n sayonara!
(PS)I managed to run 3 rounds non-stop!!YEA!!..lols...

You still turn me on...

2005-04-15T14:42:00.000-07:00

I wonder why peck hoon din come to skool...but i dun dare to call n ask her..cos i think i've made her real angry....today's chem test was kinda terrible..constance will probably be the no. 1...i wont ever be no. 1..boohoohoo..i really m not the kind of person hu would listen 2 pple..other than my laopo tok.........i just wish i would stop tt..cos i think pple will find me irritating soon..im like o self-centred..want pple to quickly finish tokin b4 i can finally tok..it's like im so rude...my hair's forever so damn messy....uggh!!!!it just is 2 stubborn..dun wan 2 settle down..2mrrw there's 2.4 KM run..so scary...n we're the last batch..it's like i dun wan 2 b last or among the last left running!it'll b so embarrassing...scary...i drank soup 2day after skool...the soup frm the western food stall is damn nice..i guess it's the only food i like in sjc..if u could call it food..but it's really delicious la..MMM..lols..:D..ur saliva's probably dripping..haha..it's like i feel like a nerd sumhow..m i 1?i really dunno..i cant wait until after the run..it'll b so great..:D..wonder how peck hoon is..haiya..but she's always angry wif me.....dun dare 2 say hi to her alredy..if not she'll start scolding me...im makin her out to be so scary huh...aiya..it's true wat..hmm..maybe ill b a normal housewife nxt time..i doubt i can b a doctor...doubting my abilities...my name wasnt on the notice outside the general office..means i dun need 2 go for remedial..BOOHOOHOO!!...i luv remedials u noe..:D..hahas...hope by 2mrrw..my tt "aunty" thing..will leavee me..u noe wat i mean rite..dot dot dot..then i hope i can get a hairband soon..cos my hair's darn messy all the time.....sitting beside sauyan is damn funny..cos she's damn funny n damn interesting..she n mr sim..always make me laugh..good for health!!!..really..laughing is gud 4 ur health..did u noe?last time i was very healthy..cos i laughed so much..nowadays....i dun laugh much....tt's y u c me coughin...k tt's all i havta say to u...SAYONARA.take care.

having 2nd thoughts...

2005-04-14T16:08:00.000-07:00

Haiya...alredy having second thoughts if i made the right decision bout the career thing..it's like i dun even noe wat job i wann get or wat job im suited for in future.....really dunno lah....i mean being a doctor is like so stressful.....n im a very lazy sort of person..:S...tomorrow there's the chem test..so much to study..i dont think i'll do well...it's like last minute preparation...anyway..miss lee just told us today.....my work has definitely been slacking....really need to look weixin up(but cant find her lately)cos she's my study partner..hahas...but really want to go thru history with her..then also there's sci..there's geog..but geog is my third priority..right now im studying science tho...n this sat there's 2.4..nxt thurs i think it shud b thurs..there's the 5 batteries thingy...that is okay..it's the running this sat tt im very scared of..i mean lately those practising for pe rite...i have been like vomiting n coughing n stuff..n feeling terrible...wat if i dun pass 2.4??o man...at least i hope i pass...last yer's timing was only 15. sumthin...lousy rite....hmm...i just went to the health promotion board website 4 fun..hahas....was thinkin of creatin a link 2 it frm my blog..but i dun think any1 will go to it...my bmi is 20.6 ...so im safe..wont get heart disease..most likely..wahoo!!:D:D..then it turns out that luckily jolene isnt angry wif me...but my classmate is..i wont say her name..but it's like...evrytime she's angry wif me..or rather almost all the time...i really dunno wat 2 say n how to phrase my words to her...she's always like mad wif me over sumthin...n i always dunno wat she's mad with me bout!that's the thing..it's always sumthin to do wif my frenz..could b a misunderstanding i think...i dun even noe..she just told me tt my fren is very kaypoh n busybody..or sumthin like that...i dunno....n luckily constance is doin the rest of the dnt thingy..:D..cos im very stressed..n i definitely dun wan to do projects..rite now ill just concentrate on my studies...especially sci n hist..i really dun think im tt smart..cos lately all i've been doin is memorising...n it's gonna kill me sooner or later....i've been losing weight...without even exercising...frm 46..to 45.8..to 44...then now 43..it's like..mayb i can get out of TAF soon....then i can go to my fav hangout evry recess..the library!:D:D..i really cant survive wifout the library...."im addicted to u..." :D:D....i dun think i've been cheerful lately..just been feeling pain...terrible i tell u..cant wait to the day i get to shift to tt new flat..:)..but must take 159 or 156..n take to the bus stop outside compass n take 119 to skool..hmm...today evry lesson i felt really really tired..i always look so tired..i wish i wasnt like that....must give the teachers sum face rite..there they r teaching...then im like goin to doze off...not bcos of their lessons being boring...it's just that i think i dun eat enuf meat...tt's y no energy mah...mayb im tokin 2 much nonsense here..i always do tt..wen will i ever say sumthin wise..hrumph..n hr later..must really study chem...eek...not tt i hate chem....but i've been in a really lazy mood lately...but i've been telling myself..tt i'd better study for this mid-year..then i can truly enjoy my june holidays..n laze around for a while during tt long holiday..:D...tryin 2 motivate myself 2...yesterday watched american idol 4 a while...bo bice is always really gud..he can turb a boring song into sumthin stylish sumhow..he's great la..n he's also cute:D:D..n 2day the "tsunami" came..well..luckily..or maybe im saying this 2 early..but i havent get caught...n if u dunno wat the "tsunami" is..it's actually the spotchecking thingy...im startin 2 worry if my belt is 2 low..tt's me..if nuthin happens 2 me..ill start worryin..lols....forever a worrier la..i cant take it ez...i dunno how 2!aiya..tt's enuf crap..take care..THNK U N GOD BLESS U!!haha..sayonara..

giv me ur hand...

2005-04-12T14:38:00.000-07:00

I really luv my blog music..HAHAS....change my layout again..lols..:D....keep changin huh...then i added link 2 2e blog..very nice..sauyan made...today maths changed place...sitting beside elizabeth n agnes..they're ok la....not so bad..hahas///.....was in a terrible mood 4 a while..but nvm......i made jolene angry i guess..:'(...sad...im still sick.....so frustratin..2day had chinese test..i din even study 4 it..sure jus pass..LOLs...lousy..haiz...tt's all. lUv U!MUACKX....
(p.s)my rite eye keeps twitching..sumthin bad gonna happen?:(..evrytime i get sumthin..jolene will also get it..or vice-versa..weird lor..she get stomach ache..i oso..she get fever..i oso get..tt's y lao gong lao po..mah..lols.

I wonder if u ever think of me....

2005-04-10T13:29:00.000-07:00

Hmm.....i feel better already :)...if any1 cares..haiz..msn so boring..without jolene,peck hoon n clarissa online.....they're the pple tt i hav lots 2 tok bout..haiz....i really wanna noe wat jolene's tele no. is...but i dunno..im really scared..wat if i call her..then i dunno wat 2 say??tt'll b the worst thing tt'll ever happen.....i have 2 sensitive frenz...plz dun ask me hu...but i really hav 2 watch wat i say.....rite now listenin to my mp3s...:D....my voice is recovering too..but i still cant reach high notes..sad...but i can reach very low notes...lucky tt there's no more choir...i used to be 46.8..n i became 46..then became 45.8..then now im 43 KG!!OMG...bein sick sorta helps..mayb i din eat much..cos i dun hav much appetite..even 1 slice of bread..im like struggling to finish it..pathetic,huh?i dun think i hav anythin else to say..hmm..gonna call cynthia now.TAKE CARE ALL..*sayonara..KAWAII!!^(^(haha)

SIGH**

2005-04-09T07:51:00.000-07:00

SIGH..so I'm forever sighing...really cant help it..yesterday din get to go to the swim meet..sad...went to compass point clinic..then i had a fever of 39 degrees celsius.had a headache(the kind tt makes u wan 2 collapse).a terrible sore throat..flu n my knees n hands were trembling..so painful..i really felt like crying..n evrytime i cough..my stomach n heart hurts...now i guess it's better..later gonna c flats again..wonder wat we got 4 syf..scary man..haiz..not tt im really spoilt..jus sum pain n im wailing n seem 2 b exaggerating(spelled rongly i think..) it..but it really was very very very painful..i wanted to vomit..but couldnt..alrite..enuf of hearin me wail..take care all of u..

Aiya.....

2005-04-06T18:47:00.000-07:00

hmmmm...i really m getting so excited!!2mrrw is syf..but then i have no makeup..sigh..just hope sum1 will share with me..haiz......d0t d0t d0t.........fri is swim meet...hopefully it wont b like tracks heats...i wont b so lonely...n i'll get to sit wif jolene or peck hoon yup...i guess they're really my only frenz in st. emilie...haiyo..then just worried bout makeup la..no makeup...wat 2 do???then...syf really gonna b damn fun i guess...hope tt we'll not get bronze...:D..after 2mrrw then must study..awww..i wont b on msn tt often..realli gotta catch up wif sci n hist especially...n my maths..OMG..terrible i tell ya...evrythin's a mess..n i dun get it..all the factorisation la..algebra la..just makes me wanna burst out...n lately i havent even done finish my corrections..kaos la..fri gonna b bz day man...2day evrythin was gr8..i guess...i din hav time 2 feel very lonely after all...had a lil conversation wif peck hoon..hahaz....im always spouting rubbish..n i bet she's bored alredy...i just get a feeling that when pple hear me,they find me boring....i dunno..i wish i was a better listener....but im just afraid of rejection n evrythin else..im really afraid of loneliness 2!i guess..those r traits of n aries...i cant believe rachel ching is also n aries..GOSH LA!!..now i realise..my frenz..r capricorn n virgo only..no others!mayb i really hav sum kind of fate with these 2 horoscopes..LOLs...wkend gonna go c flat..at punggol field AGAIN..:D...yea man..is blk 19 sumthin..i dun think it's near cyn cyn's flat..aiya.sad...then ill hav 2 go to skool alone again if i stay there...2 much maths hw..jus hate maths..makes me frustrated..2day there was 2 periods of maths..free..cos mdm alya was (i forgot*looks sheepish*)...so..ya...i spent the whole of these 2..harrassing..oops..i meant disturbing(lol:P) loraine,going to the toilet(hav u heard of nature's call?it's so fascinating..LOLs)..n then...tokin to peck hoon..tokin rubbish 2 her obviously...i scared..i think my m****s comin..shit la..LOL..evrytime it comes..my womb will b like contracting?!?..it's really gross n pain...n it happens always on the first day i get it...i dun wanna imagine it..let's jus take life..1 step at a time..wen tt pain comes..we'll tok bout it :o..i havent been studyin..so plz dun ask me anythin..my brain has really switched off these days..a friend of mine got booked 2day..really worried 4 her..HAIZ...luckily my belt normally is quite HIGH..lols..im a nerd??mayb..but i dun think so...im really talkative..n im not studious..im very lazy..believe me..but this yer..i really havta work harder...aiming for a better class..so of course la.........ill b lazy again..end of this yer..after final-year:D..hehes..haiz..Pope John Paul the 2nd..his lifestory..is really sad 2 me..2 bad 2mrrw wont c the video of his life..O MAN!!...i wanna c lor..but i oso wanna go syf..if only i can split myself in2 2..LOLS..really hope i get 2 sit wif my best pals in swim meet...n ill c them...y muz they always hold it in yio chu kang..so far...HAIYO..o well..tt's bout it..n i really luv 2 songs 2day..a thousand miles(my blog song now) n against all odds..both r beautiful..actually i think peck hoon is rite..it does sound sad...cos im starting 2 think of the tsunami victims wen i hear the song:o..aiya..it's simply magnificent..u can cry wen u hear it u noe..or mayb im 2 emotional...watever it is..lemme stop tokin so much crap n end this post now!!take care all of u..n hope more pple frm 2 endurance..will tag..it's always only yanhan,lisais...SIGH.Plz tag..n i will tag at ur taggieboard thousand more times...:D -Sayonara..-

how can u jus walk away frm me??

2005-04-04T19:21:00.000-07:00

This poem is frm a fren..
A peach is a peach
A plum is a plum,
A kiss isn't a kiss
Without some tongue.
So open up your mouth
close your eyes,
and give your tongue
some exercise!!!
nice rite?LOLS...get wat it means?AHAHA..it's not by me..it's by a frend.....today had rehearsals...we were tokin bout toxic frenz in eng lesson.......haiz..i think i m 1 at times..i cant even wait for pple 2 stop speakin..mayb im jus afraid of silence..im jus afraid tt if there's silence...the person wont want 2 tok 2 me..n just walk away..it happened many times..i seriously hav tt phobia....ate double cheeseburger wif mcd curry sauce..nice actualli..n im jus afraid of pple gettin bored of me..:(....n i havent toked to jolene much..o well....i toked 2 peck hoon,rebecca,rachel,kesia..on msn..tt's bout it..my first half of skool day is always so lousy........haiz...tt's all la...cant wait 4 thurs..:)...I LOVE U...

lalala~

2005-04-03T05:13:00.000-07:00

Hihi........................................yesterday da awards ceremony was really fun!i was really really enjoying myself..wow..it wasnt so scary after all..n i got rid of my stagefright..:)...it's relly fun performin on stage actually..relly..n today opened letterbox...so sweet of LISAIS..she gave me stuff..wow..so nice of her..there's address book,photo box,pencil,journal,notepad..very nice n beautiful....so sweet..she sent 2 me all the way frm USA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!OMG.......so touched..:o....my only birthday gift..but it's all rite..:D...im relly happy...yea...i've realised the true meaning of frenship..not bcos lisais gave me a gift.....but it doesnt matter how many frenz u hav or how popular...not all or even most of them will b ur true frenz....even tho i may not b dat popular...but..i have three TRUE FRENZ..n they're the sweetest...Jolene,Lisais n Yanhan......dun get me rong..it's not jus bcos of the gift..tt i suddenly treat LISAIS s my best frend...so it's like it's better to hav a few(even if it's only 1)true frenz..then a whole grp of frenz..hu may not relly b ur frenz.....in reality.....i realise..only 1 or 2..or the most 3 or 4..can b ur true frenz..hu will stick by u no matter wat...no matter where....they will nevr hesitate to b wif u..or jus 2 cheer u up..tho i've only received 1 gift..but im very happy........cos i realise...tt wen i used to envy pple hu were very popular..i was childish..cos...i tell u...tho they may seem ur true frenz..ull c wat happens wen sumthin happens..they jus wont care bout ya....only a few..so even if u hav only 1 true fren..u shud b very very happy..it's better than none.....:)..so i've been in a gud mood lately..:)....today went to see flat in rivervale area..very beautiful..inside looks like hotel..outside not bad either........hope can stay there....cant wait for syf n da rehearsals 2..very fun.......................i took the iq test again..turns out im a bit above the average student..altho not exceptionally brilliant..but at least im not just average:D::D:D:D:Di dunno y..startin 2 luv jewelry..(turnin in2 a real WOMAN..haha!!)..i luv necklaces..so beautiful..n rings...wow..aiya.....enuf of tt crap..wait till im 20 sumthin then say..HAHAs..k la...i think tt's all...I LOVE U! -mel-

SIGH

2005-03-31T18:05:00.000-08:00

Hmm...today's performance was just terrible...evrything just went wrong...:'(...hope sat will b betta..jolene doesnt seem to like me s a best fren anymore...i guess tt happens wen she has so many frenz around her..:'(....I FEEL terrible........no1 will ever like me...im gettin down again..just wen i was startin 2 b happy again...im back to my depressed self..wen will my tears stop comin?i guess only wen sum1 really tells me tt i m loved..tt tt person luvs/likes me..i just feel terrible.........evry1 just has their own friends..no1 will ever go near me..no1 has ever been close 2 me b4...evry1 just gets so popular n i get so sad n alone....just tired n evrythin....:'(......i guess ill get used 2 b-in ignored n unloved.forget it.

OhMyGoodness...

2005-03-30T14:16:00.000-08:00

Haiyo..so scary..2mrrw we havta perform in front of da whole skool frm 1.35 onwards..choir's performance is da first!haiz..hope xueyi will share her makeup wif moi...or ill b so lonely..no makeup!i only hav blusher..so pathetic..dun even hav foundation..shux lor......maths gettin fun..but she is still so bossy..wat the..xueyi was v. funny 2day...gave my laopo the letter..then after skool she gave me another letter..i dun think ill reply immediately..:D..her letters r always so nice n sweet..i wonder if we can remain a couple even at sec 4..cos she noes so many pple...i may b replaced:(...sigh....hope not..2mrrw we get 2 go to change n do make-up n stuff at 12.25 PM...my.....so scary lor...today did bio test about enzymes..it was scary..i dun think i did well..........scared.:(..mr lim's papers always tough de...:(gud news..2day n 2mrrw r my rest day..means i can rest da whole day..isnt tt great?of course!:D:D...i lost my bottle yesterday..n found it bak 2day!:)...i can b so absent-minded...ive been goin 4 TAF..n find it quite fun nowadays.....2mrrw im not goin....:D:D..hehez.i think tt's all..LOVE MY LAOPO(but im straight)!!

HAIZ

2005-03-29T14:25:00.003-08:00

Haiz..this may make me sound like a lesbian..:S..but I really miss Jolene,my best friend..:(we seldom get a chance to talk..:(..the most is just a hi..so sad.......then constance is forever so annoying...she's 4ever makin me angry.......she's irritating n i'll nevr call her my gud friend..the most is jus a friend......loraine is a very nice person..i feel that in 2e only she shud b my good fren..i dunno bout the others.....im jus fed up wif evry single person in 2e..EVERY..i mean EVERYONE..except 2 pple,peck hoon n loraine..the others r just..out 2 make me pissed off.....SO ANGRY...i went to see mdm hasanah after skool..cos yesterday i had a rehearsal..n missed history..she sed 1 of my frenz helped me take the history notes..i hope so.....................i really hope bio test wont b 2mrrw..Im not very very prepared..just ok.......haiz.............my days hav been so tiring..i cant wait till june holidays..WOW!........hmm....mayb i look grumpy evryday..n i c ant seem to understand certain pple at times..they're just like a code...the clues r there...but u cant decipher it..:(....n tt person is forever saying how she'll bring the project n lemme c..(i did most of the work)..but she din..she even sed she din care bout it...it's included in our marks..how can i not bother??it's always melissa who doesnt do anything..it's always melissa hu has to do all the dirty work while you criticise bout it...saying it's terrible....it's jus so unfair...hope i get to coordinate wif loraine 4 other projects or grpwork.......hmm... hope 4 home ec..ill b partnering loraine..not constance...n i guess we shudnt b 2prejudiced against homosexuals.....not tt im 1..PLZ......hav 2 wear gown n stockings(CORRECTION,pantyhose)n cord shoes..YUCK..so sick...n rehearsal's gonna b very tiring.......i hate wearing the pantyhose........EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW n the stupid cord shoes..:S

HAIZ

2005-03-29T14:25:00.002-08:00

Haiz..this may make me sound like a lesbian..:S..but I really miss Jolene,my best friend..:(we seldom get a chance to talk..:(..the most is just a hi..so sad.......then constance is forever so annoying...she's 4ever makin me angry.......she's irritating n i'll nevr call her my gud friend..the most is jus a friend......loraine is a very nice person..i feel that in 2e only she shud b my good fren..i dunno bout the others.....im jus fed up wif evry single person in 2e..EVERY..i mean EVERYONE..except 2 pple,peck hoon n loraine..the otehrs r just..up 2 make me pissed off.....SO ANGRY...i went to see mdm hasanah after skool..cos yesterday i had a rehearsal..n missed history..she sed 1 of my frenz helped me take the history notes..i hope so.....................i really hope bio test wont b 2mrrw..Im not very very prepared..just ok.......haiz.............my days hav been so tiring..i cant wait till june holidays..WOW!........hmm....mayb i look grumpy evryday..n i c ant seem to understand certain pple at times..they're just like a code...sumhow it's there...but u cant decipher it..:(....n tt person is forever saying how she'll bring the project n lemme c..(i did most of the work)..but she din..she even sed she din care bout it...it's included in our marks..how can i not bother??it's always melissa who doesnt do anything..it's always melissa hu has to do all the dirty work while you criticise bout it...saying it's terrible....it's jus so unfair...hope i get to coordinate wif loraine 4 other projects or grpwork.......hmm... hope 4 home ec..ill b partnering loraine..not constance...n i guess we shudnt b 2prejudiced against homosexuals.....not tt im 1..PLZ......hav 2 wear gown n stockings(CORRECTION,pantyhose)n cord shoes..YUCK..so sick...n rehearsal's gonna b very tiring.......i hate wearing the pantyhose........EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW n the stupid cord shoes..:S

HAIZ

2005-03-29T14:25:00.001-08:00

Haiz..this may make me sound like a lesbian..:S..but I really miss Jolene,my best friend..:(we seldom get a chance to talk..:(..the most is just a hi..so sad.......then constance is forever so annoying...she's 4ever makin me angry.......she's irritating n i'll nevr call her my gud friend..the most is jus a friend......loraine is a very nice person..i feel that in 2e only she shud b my good fren..i dunno bout the others.....im jus fed up wif evry single person in 2e..EVERY..i mean EVERYONE..except 2 pple,peck hoon n loraine..the otehrs r just..up 2 make me pissed off.....SO ANGRY...i went to see mdm hasanah after skool..cos yesterday i had a rehearsal..n missed history..she sed 1 of my frenz helped me take the history notes..i hope so.....................i really hope bio test wont b 2mrrw..Im not very very prepared..just ok.......haiz.............my days hav been so tiring..i cant wait till june holidays..WOW!........hmm....mayb i look grumpy evryday..n i c ant seem to understand certain pple at times..they're just like a code...sumhow it's there...but u cant decipher it..:(....n tt person is forever saying how she'll bring the project n lemme c..(i did most of the work)..but she din..she even sed she din care bout it...it's included in our marks..how can i not bother??it's always melissa who doesnt do anything..it's always melissa hu has to do all the dirty work while you criticise bout it...saying it's terrible....it's jus so unfair...hope i get to coordinate wif loraine 4 other projects or grpwork.......hmm... hope 4 home ec..ill b partnering loraine..not constance...n i guess we shudnt b 2prejudiced against homosexuals.....not tt im 1..PLZ......hav 2 wear gown n stockings(CORRECTION,pantyhose)n cord shoes..YUCK..so sick...n rehearsal's gonna b very tiring.......i hate wearing the pantyhose........EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW n the stupid cord shoes..:S

HAIZ

2005-03-29T14:25:00.000-08:00

Haiz..this may make me sound like a lesbian..:S..but I really miss Jolene,my best friend..:(we seldom get a chance to talk..:(..the most is just a hi..so sad.......then constance is forever so annoying...she's 4ever makin me angry.......she's irritating n i'll nevr call her my gud friend..the most is jus a friend......loraine is a very nice person..i feel that in 2e only she shud b my good fren..i dunno bout the others.....im jus fed up wif evry single person in 2e..EVERY..i mean EVERYONE..except 2 pple,peck hoon n loraine..the otehrs r just..up 2 make me pissed off.....SO ANGRY...i went to see mdm hasanah after skool..cos yesterday i had a rehearsal..n missed history..she sed 1 of my frenz helped me take the history notes..i hope so.....................i really hope bio test wont b 2mrrw..Im not very very prepared..just ok.......haiz.............my days hav been so tiring..i cant wait till june holidays..WOW!........hmm....mayb i look grumpy evryday..n i c ant seem to understand certain pple at times..they're just like a code...sumhow it's there...but u cant decipher it..:(....n tt person is forever saying how she'll bring the project n lemme c..(i did most of the work)..but she din..she even sed she din care bout it...it's included in our marks..how can i not bother??it's always melissa who doesnt do anything..it's always melissa hu has to do all the dirty work while you criticise bout it...saying it's terrible....it's jus so unfair...hope i get to coordinate wif loraine 4 other projects or grpwork.......hmm... hope 4 home ec..ill b partnering loraine..not constance...n i guess we shudnt b 2prejudiced against homosexuals.....not tt im 1..PLZ......hav 2 wear gown n stockings(CORRECTION,pantyhose)n cord shoes..YUCK..so sick...n rehearsal's gonna b very tiring.......i hate wearing the pantyhose........EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW n the stupid cord shoes..:S

:D

2005-03-25T21:55:00.000-08:00

Hmm..lately i've been more smiley..maybe a bit more like when I was younger?hahaz...i sound like im that old..im 14 2day!ate pasta gratin frm delifrance n coffee fantasy cake...frm prima deli in heartland mall!!!:)...so i've been in a gud mood lately..n of course more chatty!but i think mayb on mon..ill b bak 2 my tensed-up n sad self..o well...:D:D:D..let me smile more 2day..so ill nevr forget this day!haha..:D:D:D..managed 2 tok 2 Jojo on msn 2day..yay..but nevr get to tok 2 siok n lisais..:(...o well...nvm......jolene rem my bday after all..so happi.......hmm..my parents still searching for a flat..so far we're lookin in da hougang area..2mrrw gonna go c another flat..cos the present flat is actually rented..ya...hmm..s 4 my website..i've been 2 lazy 2 add stuff in..LOL...o well...wen im in the mood i will!yay..im 14...:D:D:D..hav i matured?NO!!!hahaz...k la...watched sound of music AGAIN..i still find it v. interesting despite having watched it so many times b4!..my..but it's so nice n romantic..n beautiful................jus now i saw the news..sum pple r so religious tt they placed nails thru their hands n feet to nail themselves 2 the cross..OMG>..so painful 2 c....ms singapore is nxt wk..:o..feel so hot n i dunno y..i mean as in temperature wise..:P...then..my mum gave me a nice sling bag...it's green..but it's still nice..n it has a bear-like chain thingy!:D:D..lol..k..all the best.tc.

dum-dee-dum...

2005-03-24T20:40:00.000-08:00

Hmm...I really don't know what to say...On monday,we're getting our progress report cards..im just so afraid..as i don't think i'll be no. 1 in this lousiest express stream class...n wats worse is if my position in the whole school is about the same,or worse!OMG...it's too scary..I really dun believe Mr sim when he says my results r great..i dun think so..i bought the book about the catholic faith during recess 2day..hmm...will b quite useful...then 2mrrw's my bday..but it's the day Jesus died,and im actually celebrating it..OMG...........................m i a JINX?i was born on the day jesus died..can u believe it?Jesus had only risen on Easter sunday...hmm...o well..i dun think ill b 2 happy 2mrrw knowin this....i guess i had 2 tell pple wen my bday was b4 they rem..n worst of all..my only best pal,JOLENE NG MEIQI,forgot :'(she din rem wat day it was..im relly sad cos of dat..as long s JOLENE rem my bday..i dun care if any1 else 4gets bout it.......i created a page of my webbie..im trying to find the right music...the music sounds spoilt..ill b addin more stuff 2 it..such s news(mostly bout health),sci notes,personal stuff,idols page,dedications 2 frenz.....n so on..i hav alredy put the link in my blog LINKS..so plz go see it evryday ur online..thx :D

Haiz.

2005-03-21T17:02:00.000-08:00

Hey...err...my results r still terrible tho i have two distinctions-chin n sci..o well..................i wanna go 3H or 3I.......haizzzz..:(.....have u heard the song sinc eu been ogne by kelly clarkson?it's really nice....cynthia was bragging to me about stuff..LOL.......................she's lucky...she doesnt study n she gets into such a good class....:(.......o well...n she has so many frenz.....im still lonely ...but nvm..getting used 2 it :)dun worry obut me...my bday is comin...but i guess i'll receive 1 present..(nvm)...as long s pple wish me happy bday....tho it's always nice 2 receive many prezzies..but my frenz seem to bz wif their own friends to bother..i bet they forgot wen my bday is..nvm...the 1 present shud b frm my mum,....she sed she would giv me a bag...haiz.....i miss lisais.i miss yan han.I miss siok.i miss RGPS>..........WAAAAAA...times passes too fast..i wan go bak to p1..lols...:(........................................those times in 1H seemed so past..:(...i feel so sad..haiz.

Stagefright.

2005-03-15T15:31:00.000-08:00

Haiz...i really and seriously have stagefright...today we,choir had to perform in front of other schools....i could really see their eyes scrutinizing us..it was so scary....i kept telling myself to calm down!calm down!omg..lols...our choir did not perform well..it was simply terrible..the best skool in my opinion is Chung Cheng..2nd best is Boon Lay..the rest ok la...:S..so scared...3 wks till syf..:(

Just an ordinary day.

2005-03-14T20:50:00.000-08:00

Today we saw our chinese n physics CT 2 Papers...the chinese paper..i made lots of careless mistakes..im forever like that..especially for physics..quite careless..i could have gotten 78 for chinese..instead got 75..then physics only got 31/40 which is 77.5..quite lousy..no 80s...i must b no. 1 n get in2 a sci class nxt yer even if it's gonna b very stressful..today choir's rehearsal wasnt gud....on mon...Hai sing catholic,Pasir Ris Crescent,Nan Hua,Chung Cheng High(Main),Clementi Town n Boon Lay...comin to our skool for choir ..haiz...........................................................................im so lousy acamedically-wise..y m i so slow?cant believe my maths had 46 only......lousy.....lousy me>:(......rite now jus concerned bout doing well..Then..mdm hasanah is ok..only her lesson is boring..

:S

2005-03-11T16:16:00.000-08:00

So bored and depressed everyday!!:(..I wish that kind of feeling would go away..it's very tiring...So afraid...i havent gone to call my mum yet..ms judy low is gonna really socld me...hope i dun get detention...no i shud put it this away...I MUST NOT GET DETENTION!!..:(..Today's sports day..still bout the same..was so hot n tiring..i was sitting nxt to Jojo..:)...but i guess i felt really really really neglected....so i went to sit wif steffi n wan ling..i think i made the right choice..they were really nice n funny..:)..my birthday's comin in a few days more...in fact..it's nxt week..well...im not excited at all...i'll be happy if there r at least 8 pple hu wish me happy birthday..on the day b4 my bday..i hate gud fri..it sucks,sucks n SUCKS!

....

2005-03-07T18:00:00.000-08:00

So depressed....no1 wants to sit with me...it just seems that im pestering pple when all im afraid of is being alone...it just seems like I'm sticking to people and annoying them..I don't know...maybe it's better for me to sit by myself and read a book...:(

Depressed.

2005-03-03T18:33:00.000-08:00

Feel so depressed..evryday i come to the school with a heavy heart,it's just too hard for me to smile..Only people like Jolene and Weixin can make me smile..today received chinese CT 2 results..i guess..it's not v. gud..i only got 37.5/50 which means 75..i always get tt mark for Yu lao shi's papers..not higher or lower..i dunnowhether to b happy or sad bout tt?I realised tt Peck Hoon is a chinese expert..she got 42/50 constance got 45.5/50..yeah..gud rite..hope can win constance in other tests..she v. gud in maths..i will definitely win her in eng i hope..so happy for peck hoon....im still not da best in class..o wellz...hope i do betta in the other subjects n hope my d n t wont b so bad..my parents never support me in anything i do..like if im happy cos im in syf..they really dun care...all they care about r results,results n more results...n if i score well..they never encourage me 2 do better...they jus discourage me n put me down...well..im not doing well for their sake..it's for my sake..my pride n my future..i wont care bout them...i jus feel that these days im becoming so dead..even my jokes r getting boring..im getting 2 serious n thinkin bout lotsa things evryday..it's either lit..or sum forms to hand in. i dun think i hate hui yan anymorez..she's a nice person..cant believe it..peck hoon put her bag nxt to mine..i guess i really luv the library..haiz...........pple hu knew me since sec 1..wont believe tt i was once a bubbly person..with a very bubbly personality..wen i was p1-p3..i luved to run here run there...tok n tok n tok n tok..play catching n lotsa stuff..i had lotsa frenz..lotsa fun..well after p3..i guess i started becoming ike a dead fish out of water...so lifeless...i only run in p.e n taf club...today they placed rachel ching's card nxt 2 mine...well..i cant stand her...anywaez i switched her card alredy..she v. wat..i just cant stand her..lately been feeling so bad..so horrible..evryday going to skool seems like a drag..no life..nothing....i havta worry bout evrything...there's jus not a moment tt i can relax...how i wish i didnt used to complain bout life being boring..luckily march holidays comin..my birthday is gonna b boring..it's not gonna seem like a birthday..im NOT looking forward 2 it anywaex..it's jus gonna b worse than any other norm day...it's not a GOOD friday for me..it's TERRIBLE.....cant wait for holidays to come..even then..i still will hav 2 work extra hard..haiz.work work work..when will i ever get to be jumpy n bubbly n funny aagin?

YAWNs...

2005-03-02T15:59:00.000-08:00

Hmm...so tired..we had choir at singapore conference hall....so big n spacious..the place was so nice...then after choir went home...then on the bus they kept on singing the peanut song we learnt in camp metamorphosis..lols..then so sleepy..we managed to project our voice but sumhow..we occasionally went off pitch..my choir frenz sed wen i sing i dun sound like wen i tok..i sing v. loudly..wen i tok..i guess it can barely b heard..:D..2day we did physics n lit. CT..physics was ez..lit was ok..tt is all i guess..:)

Realization.

2005-03-01T15:48:00.000-08:00

Hmm...Today we had geog n chi CT..then..before tt..we had pe..we ran 2 rounds(HUGE)..at first my timing was 2.18 cos i took my own sweet time..later was 2.05..improved a lil..but im sick so mayb i can do betta..i realise tt wif peck hoon u must make the first step..or she wont..she worse than me..lolz...before ct..i shaked lotsa pple's hands..actually a few lahz..like bridget,rachel ng n rachel b. ,constance,julin..n peck hoon..chi CT ok la..geog okok..hahas.......2mrrw can go singapore conference hall..so excited:)

Nice quiz I took:)

2005-02-27T17:00:00.000-08:00

You are Romantic

You are romantic.
You are just like me sometimes. You love the
classic Romeo and Juliet movies, how love
usually conquers all. People might think of you
as girly, and cute, but you are really serious
when it comes to love. You yearn to have a
boyfriend (if you don't have one) and you know
you will treasure that friendship forever. Your
first kiss may mean a big thing to you, if you
haven't gotten it yet. You fall for romantic
songs, moonlight serenades, and yes, cute boys.
You are sweet to both genders, and small kids,
and respectful for elders. You will be a very
good wife and mother. Oh yeah!

Yawns

2005-02-25T19:55:00.000-08:00

Kesia v. irritating......:(........peck hoon is a ver nice person..she's matured..only thing is she is COOL..lols..:)but she's great..btw...kesia v. irritating cos she is!!she v. wat.......&*^%$#@ lol....:)it's v. sickening..bout the raching ching matter..i hope i can b a councillor in sec 3:(....or monitress...sighz......peck hoon is really like a protective adult...hope she'll b more cheerful...once tt is solved...evrythin bout her will b ok...cant wait for those times wen she's cheerful....tho i think it'll b better to tok 2 her on msn..she's nicer to tok 2 on msn.......

:):):):):):)

2005-02-25T16:50:00.000-08:00

SO HAPPY!!...I PASSED THE AUDITION!!!I DID IT!!!YESYESYES!!!!!!!Plz dun say I'm boasting but I think I sang really well...OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:)...Haiz......................................Today after PE,I vomited...i still rem the feeling while heading to the toilet...Felt so giddy,so pain,so horrible...even after vomiting..my head was still spinning...thank to the water...I managed to feel better...Hmm..I'm starting to get used to the life of a loner...It's not so bad really...you get lotsa privacy......you dont have to talk to anyone...you can just sit in a quiet corner reading a book...well...that's my life right now....hmm...exactly 1 month after today..is my birthday..I really dunno whether to be happy or sad about it...Haiz....I guess I'm gonna be sad...I'm always so lonely on my birthdays..plus this year's 1 is on Good friday,a holiday...During choir,I saw many of them wearing the councillor's ties..I'm really envious of them...I've never got to be a leader...Is it because of my baby-like looks???SIGH...I really wan an important role in the skool...I never get it no matter how hard I try...Even in the worst class...I cant even be a monitress!on 2nd march at 12.50 we're setting off to singapore conference hall!!for rehearsal!!:)...so we're going out of class at 12:25 YAY!!:)then on 9th March another wed..we're going to go for gown fitting at ava rm..at 2.30 PM...OMG>......muz wear the cord shoes too...so yucky..lol...i cant walk properly with them...haiz...then on 2nd april there's the grand awards ceremony!!:)....our choir volume is still not gud...we're still not projecting...but....hope we improve;)

:o

2005-02-23T15:21:00.000-08:00

boring lahs..:)..

SOOOOOOOOO HAPPY!

2005-02-21T14:00:00.000-08:00

i had bad cough:(OMG!OMG!I can't believe it...this morning..the teacher talked to us about talking to a person we find it hard to talk to..then today...Peck Hoon..talked to me..on the way down to d n t,she asked me whether i had seen Constance..then she asked me about stuff..when she said my name,it sounded so sweet!:):)..then during history,mdm hasanah was absent..then atricia,amanda,kesia..n others teased me lots about me likin rachel ching..i dun even like her:'(..being the crybaby i m,u noe wat happened...so ya..i really cried silently..sumhow peck hoon,rachel b. n others found out..peck hoon knew first...then she was comforting me by placing her arms around me....seriously..peck hoon is really like my wifey..i dunno..i just feel the same way..she nearly cuddled me..like last time..jolene would do dat 2..then she stood up for me by telling off those hu had made fun of me..OMG!!so sweet..so happy:)i've nevr seen any1 so nice n sweet...i thought jolene was the nicest..OMG...peck hoon is real nice...b4 i cried..i had asked her to rite in my spo..her addy n those stuff..yanoe...i was practically begging..im so pathetic...i really hope i can b 1 of peck hoon's friend..cos she's DAMN nice,cute(wen she giggles n smiles)n she's damn SWEET...so sweet...i feel so touched...she stood up for me!the last person i ever thought would do tt!!:):)such a great person...if she's not my fren...i'll b so miserable:(haiz..im still very sad..they're forever teasing me about liking rachel ching..yucks...no thnx..so bad 1......peck hoon definitely rox:)hearing her voice really cheered me up lots..she really is beautiful,inner n outer:o..haiz..feel like cutting my hair...but....my mum wont let me!sigh...grumblex...lol..

AMBITIOUS

2005-02-18T18:33:00.000-08:00

Just now..I took some tests about almost everything..i even took another iq test..the tests r very accurate..said that people find me stable and trustworthy..n that i lack confidence..i took the 1 about leadership..im a vice-leader..means i have what it takes to be a leader..but i lack the self-confidence..today unfortunately,peck hoon din come..i took the lovecalculator thingy out of curiosity..cynthia n jolene scores are 91 %..ms lee n mr pang are 76 % me n rachel ching are 79 %..seriously..i m PURE!!!a lesbian is 1 hu has no interest in guys watsoever..hu says i dun?lol......hahaz..:P..I'm gonna update u all about my results..my chinese has been well done so far:)...happy...anywaez it's supposed to be my best subject..my eng is ok..my lt is lousy!!i cant believe it..i even failed1 test..;'(..but surprisingly hav been doing well in sci..physics tt is..for bio not sure..today just transferred sci course to bio..muz sit according to index no...I had already agreed with Kesia days ago and today that we would be sitting together in bio..then when jo-lyn asked her if she could sit wif her...she just agreed!!din care bout how i felt..tehy werent even of the same index no..i feel darn lonely...bio lesson will definitely b boring..im sitting wif huiyan..latel pple accused me of liking rachel ching..i dun even noe her well??then they discuss bout rachel ching...sigh..:(...bullied in skool haha..wan ling,atricia,amanda..they're really nice pple...shirley oso...n tiffany...n huiyan..huiyan looks like a horrid person..(the person standing in front of me during assembly)but she's got a beautiful heart!!mr lim showed us sum video bout sum egg song..v. childish yet cute..lol..bio is gonna b boring...cos is sumthin bout diffussion n osmosis..stuff liddat...well..i hope i get a satisfactory mark..weixin had 16/20 for bio paper..i must get higher than her!!!!!!i've finally sorted out what i wanna b in future..-doctor...then..errr..nowadays im v. lonely....haiz...im so lonely tt i hav time 2 think bout my future..haha...mr sim is a very nice n a very gud form teacher..yea..im always popular among chinese teachers?since prri skool?dunno y..lol...today he praised me..:D:D>....in library i saw Mr teoh n mr tan..they were having laksa wif other teachers 2!so tempting..im greedy..lately im having sum problems with history n literature!AHHHHH...peck hoon always rox...i think she rox cos she's super duper PRETTY,super duper NICE,super duper CUTE n super duper err...SUPER!!lol...went for choir today..auditions..i was the first 1...totally unprepared..so scary..knees were wobbly..passed 2 songs but failed 1 song:(hav 2 retake on mon..if fail again can get kiked out!!my IQ is 106..means im smarter than the population by some...but still among average..go n do the iq test in www.cooltests.com!!

:o

2005-02-12T10:36:00.000-08:00

so happy...yesterday received the sci n chinese papers...i think the papers r ez...but it helped me regain my confidence that i had lost since p6..i got 19/20 for physics n 25/25 for chinese!so happy...so wat if it's ez...it's making me happy..:D..anywaex..my mum n iwere discussing bout Catholic JC..it's affiliated to many skools..like my skool..my mum sez it's supposed to be gud..she'll b happy if i go there:)..i dun even noe wat occupation i'll b nxt time..i dunno y jolene is ignoring..fine..watever..tt's all bye

....

2005-02-08T10:09:00.000-08:00

just took an online IQ test...my IQ is 109...pple with IQs between 90-110 have average intelligence...c im not smart at all!:(...sigh...anywaex...u go msn .com .sg u'll c 1...anywaex...liddat...i dunn owat tosay...yesterday went in a dress...lol...creepy me..anywaex,...tc.

YEAH!

2005-02-04T19:25:00.000-08:00

so happy...cny is coming..then today we had chinese n sci test..chi test is over 25 n sci is over 20..very happy...cos i think i managed to get gud results..:)cos finally there's 1 test i can feel confident bout n that i have studied for..then..today had choir...our singing was terrible...evrything just went rong...then mrs koh was angry...so she pushed the audition to monday!:o my goodness..i not sure bout the first few parts of 1 of the songs!then my hands tremble easily..u noe the audition which we have to sing one by one(solo)muz sing the whole song..i scared...practising this weekends..take care.

:P

2005-02-03T15:18:00.000-08:00

feeling much better today....really rejuvenated..so energised..:)..dun feel so dead anymore...i love ham and egg and cheese bread...it's the food that really perked me up...we had to do a reflection on the tsunami n a poem..n a drawing for sum competition...then we did sum compo i chose the 1 bout a broken promise...:Ptomorrow there's chinese n physics tests..:o..scary...i got full marks for my ting xie today:)hehe..got 24 words..:D>..< the reflection thingy..was done by Loraine,Caroline,Me and Rachel B. ...i think for eng the only stuff im actually expert at r grammar n spelling..sighz~im hopeless:P..then i went for dental appointment...the dentist praised me by saying taht i brushed my teeth evrydya:):)..hehe..it didnt hurt like my ex-dentist appointments..it was too fast:D..take care

................................................................

2005-02-01T18:18:00.000-08:00

Hmm...today..i didnt go for p.e...ms low very funny wen she saex,"AIYOOO."lol...then i used up my 1st excuse alredy..really hope Bridget will be better..cos she poor thing...always so ill..then Peck Hoon rox...I-mai kept asking me hu peck hoon is..not like i dun wanna tell her...but muz c for herself...:D..anyway today..during d&t..we were sketching isometric drawings..then elizabeth was like,"i c ur drawing.."then.."wah so nice..(AS IF>>THIS 1 i saex..)"then Peck hoon was like,"I c.."then she sed...wah very nice lehx...i draw like dunno wat.."sumthin liddat lah..her character like jolene leh..really n seriously..my goodness..........both also look so chio..lol..peck hoon v. nice de...then v. bz...luckily i have frenz like constance,xueyi...then today...found outi g et in2 TAF...(expected)then the unexpected thing was im not in 120% im in 110%!!!yay...my weight 46 KG...so heavy..summore i only 146 CM..i have v. heavy bones....i cant even lift my own leg up!!then if any1 sees this blog n is frm 2E..i'll die..:o..cos got peck hoon's name on evry post...:o..so scary..then for music..muz pay 50 cents for pick for guitar..im not even interested in learning guitar..i think it's a waste of time..sorry guitar lovers..i really dun like guitar cos it's boring.......i'd rather play the flute..or drum..or saxophone..or anything other than guitar n violin..i really wanna learn how to play the piano..:(..no1 wants to teach me..sighz~..then fri there's sci n chi test..:o..so fast..there's gonna b lent soon..means im not gonna eat the whole day...drink of course...but not eat...it's to rem the suffering of jesus christ..okay..byez...hope 1 day i'll b peck hoon's fren tho i dunno how since im so boring..tke carex alwaexx

PUKEX~

2005-01-31T17:55:00.000-08:00

On Sat..i went to St. Anne's Church...was nice...lotsa stuff to think obut..lotsa songs to sing..Today...i already felt veyr queasy...felt like fainting..then after PE..i had to go vomit1!so weak 1...then i noe that we shud not wait for pple to approach us to be frenz...but i dunno how 2 approach peck hoon??..then d&t im foreva slow...:(..luckily there's ms chua...she's the best..i didnt go for choir...cos my legs still wobbly..i lost my file in the music rm...luckiyl i got bak:)...i was so relieved...u noe my catholic welfare tickets were inside...:o..if lost...have to make police report...my gosh...then have worksheets to photocopy if i lost...lucky...im so grateful to god..then my knees r still wobbly...mayb gonna eat beef prosperity burger today for dinner...who noes?k..take care..i dunno y evry1's so bad to Bridget...she's so nice...it's her bday today...then..tomorrow there's the councillors n monitors investiture...:D...yay...:)...Peck Hoon Rox foreva..~ I love you*

:))))

2005-01-28T18:55:00.000-08:00

I'm really happy today..:)...For once I'm in a good mood..and i got to have a hearty laugh today:)..lol.we re-elcected the monitresses..n i think all three of them really deserve to get that title..Monitress No.1:Choi Ling(She's Very Responsible)No. 2:Lin Xin(Same..also very easygoing..can be serious and playful..)No.3:PECK HOON!!:)(U noe the reason:))..peck hoon is a monitress..:).......yay...then PE was fun..Ms Low wasnt so bad after all...we did some games and it was so fun..I still havent completed my D&T...sigh..i hope it wont be like last year again..luckily there's Miss Chua around..Then during science lesson,Amanda,Xue Yi,Julin and Wan Ling asked me if i wanted to be PTS with Constance..i didnt noe..then i sed yes..so paiseh..then they later changed said i like Rachel Ching..wah..then they said i like Mr Pang,Mr Sim,Mr Seng..n many more...they said I'm a ten-timer...wah..really funny..cos i didnt feel as bored as i normally felt..friends really can lift ur spirits up..:P..I saw NPCC taking the bus to somewhere...didnt c cynthia:(only saw Jolene...then during choir,there were auditions for sec 1s..only 10 made it!!some sung really well..like Mrs Koh said..they r really gud singers..but only 10-.-then we found out that Mrs Koh was 3 months pregnant!!:o..then we werent gud with our pitching..actually it's like we always sound so gud in the choir rm..but in the hall..on stage we just like...totally black out..so we're going to Singapore Conference Hall on 2nd March to practise..then we'll be perfrming in front of other choirs too...to get rid of our stagefright..Choir was as fun as usual...I'm going to St. Anne's Church for mass on Sunday Morning:)yay~Take care.God Bless you.
(P.S)I really dunno y pple dun like Bridget..She's really a nice person...my close fren:)other than xueyi..

..........

2005-01-27T14:32:00.001-08:00

Today we had mass..our first mass of year 2005..it's so nice..:)..i just need to clarify sumthin k???im a christian..but since young i've always taken the communion...i dunno wats the prob...anyway....Rachel Ng and Rachel Braberry were really nice to talk to..then there's Ruth too..:)..then after the mass..i realised i havent given up on Peck Hoon..(that's SPH)..i've truly given up on *JN*..anyway i couldnt stop looking at Peck Hoon..i think she has similarities to Nicholas Tse..her voice so cute:)..low but very cute..she called my name..:)..she said,"Melissa,why dont you put ur bag inside the room."(we were outside Mr pang's homerm..sci lab..)but i looked s if ignored her!im so bad..-.-..then played ji gou pa n er ling wu..i cant believe it...Peck Hoon called my name..she called my name!!!:D..she really rox..then yesterday she accidentally bumped into me a few times cos it was so crowded with pupils..my goodness..now u noe how i felt..lol..dun say im disgusting..then today she was near me many times..:o..my heart..beat so fast..:o..im not les......anyway i couldnt get the courage to ask her to rite in my SPO..:(..like last time..i couldnt have the courage to ask*JN*to rite in my SPO but she did..so..then..we had to re-elect our monitresses..cos 2 of them had their belts detached..choi ling will probably b 1 of the monitresses..i voted for Ruth..then we had grp work for eng..grouped with Rachel Braberry,Ruth,Kesia,Jolyn...then we did the Oh my chek chek thing..lol..so funny..:D..then liddat..k..bye

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2005-01-27T14:32:00.000-08:00

i'll do what it takes till i touch the sky!

2005-01-26T22:00:00.000-08:00

Hi again...:)Today for music lesson,we learnt how to play the guitar..i think i only have the talent for dancing n singing..:o...been playing habbo sg lately wen im free.:)been winning lots of stuff.:)...anyway...the personality test that we took...showed that i was a precisionist...today...talked to rachel ng,rachel bulberry,xue yi n constance...i dun like 2 expect so much...but my friend must always have these qualities(and they always have)
1)Must not be blurrer than ME and make me repeat more than twice what i have said(i really HATE it wen pple do that..i can get short-tempered easily....that is 1 of those stuff that can make me get angry easily..
2)MUST be neat..(all my best pals r neat...so nothing 2 say:)cos i cant stand untidyness or sloppyness..
3)Cannot be bossy..(i just hate pple hu order others around)
4)Aiyah..as long as you dont make me repeat my words(I get VERY angry if i have to do that)..n o ya 1 more thing...i luv pple hu r POLITE...im not referring to any1 in particular..but if u like need to borrow a pen or watever frm me...plz dun take it straight frm my pencilcase or without asking me..even if i usually say yes..n even if u have known me 4 a long time..that's the other thing that makes me hot-tempered other than the 1 i mentioned...that's y i've been so fiery nowadays...i have a temper too..k..wen im angry..watch out..actually nuthing much lah..i'll just get very MOODY.im just telling u all all these cos im getting very moody each day..i dun wanna shout at pple...really..i hope im not expecting too much..but many pple keep asking me to repeat myself many times(at least 4)*CTTH*.. n so on..n it's just irritating..i get angry easily i tell u...1 of my friends hu r really great is Yan Han..n also cynthia..they all nevr ever make me shout at them..:)..they rok..they're the kind of friends i LOVE..anyway i've given up on SPH...o ya n 1 more thing i mentioned b4..bout calling me names*PLPS*called me Spastic(wadeva tt means)that 1 oso..i told u im short-tempered almost anything annoying can make me lose my temper...SPH alredy has *EY*so nvm...take care..i've given up on *JNMQ* too.so ya..wen i've given up on pple means i've GIVEN UP on them..totally..so..k..bye

SPH

2005-01-24T16:53:00.000-08:00

today..during d&t SPH asked me for a pencil...then my pencil had no lead!!!so paiseh...:(.:(there goes my chance....SPH is very close to sum classmates probably cos tehy were from the same classes...:(..so jealous...my schooldays are boring..no one to talk to..i had a silly idea at firs.t..of cutting my hair into a boyish hairstyle...but i guess not...i like long hair:)..If you wanna know who SPH is....i guess i'll tell u lah..or mayb not:Dher surname is SNG..k?enuf hints liao..she's in table-tennis..but i dun even know when table-tennis is...n where..sigh...if not can watch her play..:D...im crazy..ya...i just hate being so lonely...no one cares about me...then today..Mr Sim changed our seats again....then i had to sit with her...i dun like her.......she's so noisy...im so bored everyday,...with no friends to laugh with...that's why i realise i'm getting sleepier and sleepier...i used to be so bubbly n lively...now i just feel so old and stiff..cos no one will laugh with me and talk to me...i'm just bored....life is boring for me..i just wish someone(like SPH)would just one day suddenly come up and talk to me and we can be best friends and so on and so forth...i just look so daydreamy nowadays...i wish usm1 would save me soon.....then evry1's treating me like how they treated Grace..n now Grace is kinda ok cos she has frenz...im happy for her...n im depressed for myself...i have no friends..at least no friends who willlaugh with me..and bear with my quietness...SUM1 SAVE ME.................................................
(PS)we gonna have solo auditions...for choir...so if cant sing the songs well will probably get out of syf:(..syf april leh...starting on april fool..i just dun look forward to school anymore these days..last time im like always so refreshed n happy..it's just so hard for me to smile these days....wen i c all my frenz...i feel ASHAMED...that's y i'll look away...life is TERRIBLE

Busy...

2005-01-22T16:21:00.000-08:00

my life's too busy these days...n everyone keeps reminding about how i look everyday..either is,"Are you Miss Lee's daughter?" or(My parents),"Your kind of looks still want to dress up nicely.." n so on n so forth........can sum1 just stop caring bout my looks for once???i noe..im not as slim as those models...n not as gorgeous as some actresses...but please...............quit it...especially the one about Miss Lee and me...we have no relations whatsoever ok...quit spoiling my day.....I am Melissa,Miss Lee is Miss Lee..ok??????please..that's why I'm in a really bad mood these days..those people who don't call me names..im really grateful to u(Jolene,weixin)the others.............i have a temper too n i have FEELINGS..k..i just want to be who i m..gosh...lately i have just started playing habbo hotel sg...won a tv...then traded for 2 stools,3 chairs,a mat ...that person very generous 1..my user is princessmelissa...my occupation on hh..is constable (patroller)o im sorta part of the police:)..i wanna b police woman wen i grow up..i dun care bout the pay..i always wanted to join NPCC,or brownies or sumthin,or St. John's,but my parents..they dun allow:(i chose choir s a last resort..then SPH didnt go to skool on Thurs..sad...she always looks so sick these days...hope she's better..im praying for her..:)...my mum says she dreamt tt we were in the house then there was water below...my parents didnt get into the water..they managed to balance...then i went inside the water...but sumhow i managed to stay afloat...plus my nightmares..i guess i'd better b careful...im told to keep a low profile!:o...o well...rooster year...sigh...american idol was nice...there's still jokers hu arent serious bout the competition at all..but still it's fun..to watch..k tc

PANT

2005-01-19T15:13:00.000-08:00

So tired...cos just now went with weixin to compasspoint...then went back to skool to deliver sumthin important...i walked..haiz....tomorrow u'll find out wat the important thingy is..:P..tho it's supposed to have passed...but still it 's very important...mrs goh's pregnant...i think..:)..actually...i dun hate d&t cos of her...i hate the subject...i got to sit with SPH!!:)...now d&t is really fun...although it's only 1 period...still it's sumthin...so so happy....during music we watched the instrcutors play guitar...cos we're gonna learn that for music lessons...all my teachers r really nice..xcept for Ms JL...she's scary....then we had to do the hopping thing...just ask weixin n u'll noe....it was tiring...but still i felt much better after those workouts...i think mayb SPH glanced at me a few times...or mayb im imagining things..i cant reveal her name here..unfortunately..Yesterday...i said sumthin wrongly...her voice is not like Jolene's one...hers is lower...more like guys:D...she's quite quiet n guai(like me hahax)but her frenz r very noisy...Mrs Tan YiLin Rox....cos she's always so caring...:)...i wish i could b like her...then she's so pretty...no wonder she's married...such a nice teacher:P...if u dunno hu she is...rem the teacher hu tried out th e jumping the trapeze thing?ya...n she was my camp teacher.. take care... People who RR(really rock)today..:Jolene,Cynthia,I-mai,SPH,Mr Sim,Mrs Tan YiLin,Ms Alya...

..

2005-01-18T19:07:00.000-08:00

I really wonder..is there life after death?i mean..like we have a soul n a spirit that makes us who we are.....my mum says the spirit will go to another world..cos i dreamt of me waiting to be reincarnated...but my mum sez my life line on my palm is so long..but m marriage line is bad:oi wanna go visit my Eugene korkor(cousin)He died in a motorcycle accident...it was so tragic..he's resting at St. Anne's Church now..i miss him...but i dun dare to go in there alone...i dunno hu 2 ask 2 come wif me...any1 hu's gutsy..:Pdo u noe?he was 1 of the few relatives whom i was very close to!...today...me n weixin argued over sumthin...cos she always approaches me wen im not in a gud mood...n jolene always approaches me wen im in a gud mood...most of the time anywaex..im gonna come to skool earlier from tomorrow onwards...i think i've really adapted to my class..Mr sim rox..he's funny..:P..then my other teachers rok 2...im gonna tie 2 plaits frm 2mrrw onwards..not 2 act cute...just to keep my hair neater..the canteen storeholders r really nice pple 2..pple were tokin bout the green frog thingy tt my grp,Chrystallis n section Chunky performed..so honoured..:D...then i dunno y sumtimes i get really happy...at times i feel so down.....just c my xpression...if im down...no1 can approach me xcept cyn n jolene n SPH k?(Wen i c SPH i always smile..she just makes me happy n wen i c Jojo.. n cyn i feel like laughin n tokin to them..guess wat?tt time the high elements challenge..i didnt dare to jump for the trapeze thing..but i suddenly saw SPH down there..so i got the courage to jump..if Jolene was there too..i could ha even touched the trapeze thing..haha)cos they're the only 1s whom i will nevr feel sad wif even if im sad...i did history revision test today...didnt do 2 well...then there was ting xie..i think i'll be going to skool at 6:30...if possible..if not 6:50..i need to hand in my ting xie book n my hw to mr sim by 2mrrw morning!..im definitely in TAF club...mayb i can run with rebecca!:)i luv the gym anywaex...SPH still didnt tok 2 me...i didnt say anythin to her 2!!:(........but hu noes?mayb by the end of thid year...we could b really gud friends..tho now she has frenz like EC n AC...i jus found out that SLX..livs near my block!!oh......but i dunno her at all..but i think she's 1 of the nice pple...at least my gut feeling saex so...SPH just toks n behaves like Jolene!!except Jolene has long,nice hair...but wen i first met Jolene,her hair was short 2..:)..tt's all...all the best..on 20 th Jan..during recess sumthin interesting is happening...:Ddunno y wen i look at Jojo..i think of Jay Chou..wen i look at SPH i think of Nicholas Tse..Cyn sed she's not chio...anyhow say 1...i see cyn i think of SHE..take carex

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2005-01-16T15:08:00.000-08:00

i just added the song wo ai ni by she...it just makes me wanna cry...especially wen it comes to the zai tian tang yong bao..part...is so touching.........it makes me think of the tsunami..i'll be adding jay chou's jiang jun soon...so rem to turn back...that song rox 2...

OMG!!!

2005-01-15T22:14:00.000-08:00

the skin on my face...is peeling off...so horrible...hope it'll get better....i look like a monster!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMY!!!!

2005-01-15T13:51:00.000-08:00

today's my mum's birthday!!!!!:)she's 41 now...yay...actually yesterday already half celebrated her bday...we ate sum coffee cake from bread talk...yummy...right now im eating nonya zhang...yummy..:P...cos i only like nonya zhang no others...if u dunno wat im referring to im referring to wat u call zong zi....:)..Di Nu Hua on channel 55..is coming on 19 Jan...cant wait..it's a really nice n touching n beautiful show..charmaine sheh,steven ma acts in it too!!!!so cool...im still looking like a lobster...hehe...but now it's not as pain as before...but my face is still red...horrible...n my nose is the worst...i think the dried-up or dead skin will come off soon...i hope...finished my art homework...the "know your ingredients"...now while others r terrified of water..im terrified of the sun:o..:P...my mum sed im so xiao jie tho i dun behave like 1..haha..n i dun look like a xiao jie 2..if i cut my hair really really short...i look like a guy..:)..but i un wanna cut my hair...i luv long hair...anyway my hair's thinned down now..so it's ok....at least i can ifnally tie plaits..unlike last time..weixin has such thick,long hair...that time during campfire...she scared evry1..:P...sum more at night..im really vain....yesterday...because of the horrible sun...my face was terrible...pimples started to pop out evrywhere...then i went to find the three facial foams i had...n i rubbed evrywhere on my face...well it paid off...now except for the red skin...my complexion is like previously:D..now i simply luv to bathe in cold water...:)...american idol is starting soon too!!!20 n 21 jan..my doggy...Benji...yesterday missed me lots..i think..n he kissed me lots...haha...so wet...my dog's behaviour is just like a person's...n now thankfully he's more matured n doesnt bark so often...he doesnt bite at all of course...he's the best doggy...luv him..:)..my skin's peeling off..so yukky..o well..k take care...

Three Cheers for camp!!!

2005-01-14T14:13:00.000-08:00

Camp was fun...i'll be missing Instructor Xuan a lot...she rox...she's the best !!she's funny,cute,nice,caring n evrything....Instructor Eddie,Instructor Glenn,Instructor Shai...they all rok too...n Mr macho n mrs macho...i think today for the cheers...i screamed the loudest this morning..n the highest too...:P...o well...i had a gud sleep last night during the camp...
12th Jan
I belong to the group called Chrystallis(grp 9)n section c,Chunky.. Went rafting..so cool...but i got my clothes wet...hahaz...then it was so muddy.....my shoes n socks were dirty...so disgusting...my tent mates...were Pei Si(nice person..),Ya Shi,Shu Hui..
13th Jan
did the high n low elements..was fun...the trapeze thingy was SCARY..only 1 girl managed to catch it...her name's Nella...from grp 10...but oso from my section,Chunky!!:P...our section names r so cute...Attitude,Baby,Chunky,Darling...My darling baby has a chunky attitude...fine im talking rubbish..:P...there's campfire!!!!...our grp managed to sway to the music superstar before we performed cheers..i was having so much fun..pple might have thot i looked like i took drugs..Then i was late after bathing to assemble at the tentage..cos i was the last to bathe..then the instructor Glenn i think called me n Shu Hui squirrel...so embarrassing...:othe night trail was fun,but dark..i dun think it's lame like sum pple find..i think it's a really interesting experience...i went on it before but without these teachers n instructors scaring us like that...it was scary...kind of...but actually i only looked at the ground..but i saw "Sadako" from the corner of my eye..crawling...so i screamed a lil...the pple behind me were grabbing me..scary
14th Jan
going home time...i was too emotional...and they played the westlife song....i cried...cos i thot of how im gonna miss the camp so much...:'(...im a crybaby if u didnt noe..:P..i miss my darling doggy..miss my parents..miss my home..miss evrything..miss my books..hehe..SPH rox...only Cynthia noes hu im toking bout......It's not the brand of the textbook..it's a person's initials...she rox..but i still think Jolene rox the most...then cynthia too...i managed to HUG Cynthia,I-mai...n tho i hugged them before hugging Jolene....but Jolene gave me a hug n i gave her another hug...i think it's a bear hug...:)...my Lao Po ALWAYS rox...always..im listening to my music now...i need to download mp3s after mopping the floor...whew...Three Cheers and Three Cheers and Three Cheers for Lao PO!Hugashaga Hugashaga Hugashaga Hoo,Hugashaga Hugashaga Hugashaga Hoo,Hugashaga Hugashaga Hugashaga Hoo!!!!...i was so enthu today...wonder that i have a voice...my mum sed i looked like a...i forgot:P...but she sed im so red...haha...my neck was pain...then i found out i had a blister on my right foot...it was very pain...actually i already had it on campfire night...i was limping..i dun care wat any1 says but Britney n her music always rox...she sings so well while dancing...how many pple can actually do that????plz think of her capabilities before criticising her non-stop...sure...she's not that conservative...but she still rox....k take care...i say 1 cheer here..k?is my grp cheer...or rather section cheer...Superman,man,man,Superman,Spiderman,man,man,BatmanWho are who are who are we?We are we are we are who..Who are who are who are we?We are we are we are who...Who are we?We are who?We are CHUNKY!!!:P....i also had the westlife song in my mp3 player...listening to it right now..hahax...gotta log off now...love dancing lots...if i get to JC..im ognna join dance club for sure...One of our cheers there's the Green Frog,Macho Frog,Sexy Frog and Gay Frog..haha...cute...then there's 1 more..Instructor Jasmine:Chunky are you ready?Us:Ready!Instructor Jasmine:Are you sure?Us:Of course*looks haughty*Instructor Jasmine:How steady are you?Us:Sup sup steady!Instructor Jasmine:What?How steady?Us:Steady Steady Pom Pee Pee!!:P...then the other grp i think it's the attitude section...always sed the potong yau...cheer...it was so fun....now listening to flying without wings...god bless u..

:

2005-01-11T18:05:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow's camp already!!we're going to costa sands resort...today i got punished by Mdm Hassanah...my history teacher,i had to stand at the back of ther classroom..oh well..luckily..weixin gonna lend me her sleeping bag...:P...wen i come back from camp im gonna b very bz..so plz dun call me unless it concerns a life..:P..tomorrow is camp day...but it's another special day...:)..but i cant giv the prezzie yet...i'll giv that person probably on tues...but if we meet 2mrrw i guess i'll wish her happy bday..............................hope nuthin goes wrong at the camp....u may think im paranoid...but im really scared if the tsunami comes...brrr....scary...i pray for safety...today the sec 3s went to malaysia...almost evry lesson we have to sit according to our index no.s...luckily Olivia Loh n Loo Hui Yan are not so bad...im right between them during flag-raising..Olivia's the nicest talkative person in my class..i guess..maths n eng lessons...only both of us r sitting together...sigh...so lonely...i dun really have any friend in my class...constance n i still dun really noe each other...then today had sum grp work for eng...worked with Josephine n Samantha.....i dun like PL...she's very horrid...then...tt's all......~im so lonely~ take care

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2005-01-10T22:12:00.000-08:00

Kesia,Constance n Wan Ling talked to me today!!...constance is my d&t partner...:P..nuthin much to say.....take care

C'mon Let's Pray!!!

2005-01-09T11:00:00.000-08:00

Hi peoplez!!:)..in a good mood...at least until tomorrow...but 2mrrw there's eng which is taught by mrs margaret low!!she rox..then there's home econs or d&t...if u have read the newspapers...the public warning system will be sounded at around 5..that is the sign for us to have a 1 min of silence n stop whatever we're doing in memory of the tsunami victims...those catholics n christians(or even if ur not)should all pray..i really think we shud pray...Firstly...for our safety....that God protected us from harm...secondly for those who have gone to heaven..those tsunami victims..so after the min of silence has ended..im gonna pray hard...n hope those missing will be able to come back safely...if u had seen channel newsasia..an old man came back safely after 11 days since the tsunami disaster..he was found in the rubble!!just hope that there wont be any more news of death..then yesterday on CNA,i also saw that sum pple from poor countries were very happy...cos they finally had food...they probably didnt have food before the tsunami..at least not for free...the tsunami has really helped me wipe out totally the idea of suicide...cos at first i didnt want to endure in 2 endurance...i just wanted to die..but after that...i felt really lucky..n scolded myself for being so silly..i cant just die cos of that..many pplee r fighting for their survival..so im gonna tell myself to smile n face evryday's challenges bravely..even if any1 looks down on me n doesnt care bout me...i will persevere..take carex..n rem to pray!!

Wooo

2005-01-08T13:34:00.000-08:00

I just realised after 13 years...i have so many "dimples" n 2 moles on my face..hehez...im kinda silly..:P..im planning to tie 2 plaits wen my hair's grown longer..cos it's thinner it'll be easier to tie plaits...for now..i'll just keep to my 1 ponytail...i cant stand my class always..i dun like their attitude..my class i guess r mostly quite good looking..they shud enter beauty pageants...not me tho..i'd rather work harder...n do well..take care

:(

2005-01-07T06:15:00.000-08:00

Anne Frank is such a sad story...today...there were lots of assignments..luckily my comp is working or else i wouldnt know what to do..Mrs Tan Yi Lin,Mrs Margaret Low,Ms Judy Low,Ms Alya,Mr Sim,Mdm Hassanah,Ms Phang,Mrs Maefrize Khoo,Mr Ralph Ong n so on r teaching us..noe i have NO prejudices against Jay Chou whatsoever...at least he doesnt look like a gangster now...i gotta do all my research...cos i dun wanna b s irresponsible as last time..i havent exactly made friends yet..luckily,i still have cyn,jolene,weixin,shimin,i-mai...im so worried 1 day they'll fade away..at least nowadays i can still c them after skool..how bout in future?MY DAD JUST SAID THAT THIS MORNING AT COMPASSVALE HE SAW MY SKOOL'S PEOPLE SMOKING AND PLAYING CARDS!OMG...take care.

yay

2005-01-05T04:13:00.000-08:00

dunno y but ms chow changed the cca concert thingy to tomorrow...i'll be standing before the mike...so if i make a mistake..no no i wont dare think that...so u all r gonna hear my voice in the mike...hahaha....hope we get to sing the other song...we only practised 1 song for rehearsal today...such a pity...the other song is also very beautiful....but the prob is we cnat find a suitable pianist...the song we practised was acapella...i pray we'll be singing that song..that 1 is so nice...the choir practised so hard for that one!!!...it's too wasted if we dun sing it jus because there's no pianist...tomorrow there's history,pe n pccg n science...wonder hu my teachers will be..i've been thinking how high my belt is...or mayb it's just what i think..today mr sim told us to write aboutour reflections thingy bout year 2005...then also got the tsunami thingy...im guilty cos i didnt do anything...but they added my name in:P...then mr sim can be very funny...then i just slipped away from the mental skills thingy...i dun like it...it's not part of choir practice anyway...i think tt's all..k...take care god bless......

JOLENE

2005-01-04T20:50:00.000-08:00

yay!!!comp was repaired today!!!:)My form teacher now is Mr Christopher Sim and co-form is Ms Alya n maths is Ms Chan Ann Gee...i cant stand my class...i've finally made 3 gud pals though...1 from choir...the rest...nah...i dun belong to their gangs...they're really nasty......they're like gangsters...feeling very embarrassed lately...the person im missing most evryday is my laopo,Jolene...luckily it wasnt Ms Tan Cheo Tee,my ex-maths teacher who died in Phuket due to the Tsunamis...today..there were many talks...During the Tsunami talk,I watched the video and due to my emotional self,i CRIED!can u believe it?i cried...i heard sum1 sniffing beside me...haiz...no1 can ever ever replace Jolene as my best friend..no1...the camp im looknig forward cos i have known sum friends...amelia,amanda..they're relally nice...at least is not grouped according to class...then another embarrassing thing was i went to the wrong group..lol...oya bout the pple i knew from my class again..they're Xue Yi,Rachel Bulberry n sorry i forgot..:o..silly me..the camp shirt's nice..but i dun have a sleeping bag...i dun wanna buy 1...:'(..i'll just bring my pillow then:P..hehe..hope cynthia,jolene and weixin will always stay beside me and support me no matter what i do...cos they're the best frends any1 can have..k..at least im not that lonely in class like yesterday..so miserable.....choir performance is on fri..i cant wait!!!we'll be performing 1 or 2 songs...n i hope jolene will continue keeping her long hair...JOLENE rox.take care god bless..

:'(

2004-12-31T21:00:00.000-08:00

It's such a sad ending for the year 2004...cos of that tsunami......haiz...life is jus too short.....i was told that the killer waves missed south-0singapore by a marginal...soz cant change backgorund yet...comp has a prob..god bless hope those tsunami victims r ok..take care

Ms/Madam Tan Cheo Tee??

2004-12-30T15:35:00.000-08:00

got my multi-coated specs yesterday:P..it's sitll purple but darker....i found out from the newspapers(Streats and Straits times)that Ms/Madam Tan Cheo Tee is one of the missing people in Phuket due to the Tsunamis!Omy gosh..they also said that her brother n sister were looking for her..omy...i really hope it's not her....they say she also has children...whoa......u c Ms Tan Cheo Tee was my pri skool maths teacher..i hope that if it's her..she'll be alright.......:(...God bless her n may god guide her back home..take care...

SIGH

2004-12-29T13:10:00.000-08:00

sigh...all those terrible tsunami attacks:'(...this shows how powerful nature really is..my comp has a weird prob...on fri im going to tampines library n getting new specs..:P.....nuthing much to type these days...been exercising too..this is the last time i'll be typing this:No. 1 choice of JC:Temasek JC,2)Meridian JC....k tt's all...take care..

MY RECORDINGS:)

2004-12-25T22:22:00.000-08:00

Hi again!!i have recorded two mp3s..my very own voice!!but i dunno how to place it on this blog...cos it's frm my desktop..cant use that url..o well..if u want me to send the 2 mp3s..jus tag me or email me at moxl_91@hotmail.com ..it's really babyish..o well..i'll send by email or msn if u wan..

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

2004-12-25T13:16:00.000-08:00

Hi!!!MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!:)..yesterday my dad bought from Carrefour(did i spell correctly?)a turkey,glazed ham n log cake..very yummy..i ate so much yesterday...my goodnesss...amazing y i didnt put on weight..my mum sed tt turkey is not fattening n it's less hormonal than chicken...all of the food was yummy..yesterday i practically forgot about controlling my diet!!lol..i asked myparents why we were eating all these food yesterday,which was christmas eve...they said that most pple did that..anyway..yesterday was the most specail christmas i ever had..even wen my dad once earned about $8000 a month(we were rich that time..),we never actually celebrated christmas as one whole family,it wasnt so special...n wen my parents were almost bankrupt..we didn't even say"MERRY CHRISTMAS" to one another,probably cos all of us were too frustrated or sumthin..finally..:)..then my parent sdefinitely dun need to giv me any more presents on my bday...my dad bought me n mp3 player!!it's really cool n kinda small..it can play up to only 28 mp3s(such a pity),but it can record ur voice into the comp..so i can finally get my so-called dream ocme true!!i can finally sing n create my own mp3 file..then there's lots more things i havent found out yet..so cool..haiz..usually we nevr giv persents on christmas... n suddenly out of the blue!,my dream has come true(hee rhymes..:P)im just so happy...my parents have been so nice to me even though i didnt study properly..im so guilty...anyway..im so happy...no1 has ever done so much for me..i almost cried..cos i was so touched...last time,i had thought my parents didnt love me or care bout me...im not implying that unless they give me stuff,they're not my parents n they dun ove me..but really last time i was just throwing my childish tantrums..i feel so loved like wat sylvester sed at the finals..anyway i didnt really need the mp3 player(im not supposed to bring it to skool btw)..i jus like it..cos of the voice recording thingy n other stuff..lol..but it's still nice..n if u ask me..i dun want a handfone either...n i dun need 1...i go to skool n come home immediately..why do i need a handfone????cos u c,im kinda a miser maybe but if im really so happy..i can splurge on so many stuff..hehee...but im not much of a spendthrift...evrytime my mum n i go shopping,i will sound as if evrythin is expensive n she calls me a wet blanket..lol..:D..mayb i m one..one week till skool reopens..the only thing im "excited" bout is finding out if my teachers r strict or lousy...most likely they'llpush the VERY lenient teachers who cant control a class or teach it...or hopefully they will think we need a FIERCE teacher...i prefer fierce teachers...cos the fierce teachers i met,they always had a soft interior under that tough exterior..d&t will be the worst i dunno how many d&t teachers there r in the skool..so far i noe there r 2...the guy..he's always calling me stupid..cos im definitely not technically-inclined..this is another "good news" cos maybe i wont go ITE..but to me it's a bad news..im a perfectionist..that's y evry1 always hears me grumbling bout evrything..especially if others r singing on stage..not that i can sing very well lol...as for the other d&t teacher..she's very unreasonable to me..tho i think she was trying to be nice to me??i dunno..she's just too fast at teaching..mayb im slow..haiz.d&t is important,so important..cos i cant fail it..i really hope the written work will earn more marks for d&t...i tell u im hopeless not a technical student..another thing i can look forward to is choir..tho i feel so left out there..evry1 has thier GANG..only me n 2 or 3 others//but we're all quiet so.....haiz..i really dunno how to be a more socil person..wen sum1 is crying,i really wanna comfort her but i dunno how to..i mean put ur arms around the person..wats so difficult bout tt?i guess im not the teddy bear kinda person..fierce teacher s r better once again..cos they can control a very naughty class..take for example last year..the form teacher didnt control the class n we were so noisy..luckily the monitresses managed to keep us quiet,for a while..jus hope i can get a good teacher who's willing to explain stuff to me..cos i will probably look the teacher up after skool or call her if she's willing to tell me her handfone no.dun say im crazy but i hope i get sum1 like Mrs Ng,Mrs Khoo,n the discipline teachers..:P.. i oso hope i get Miss chew..o well..jus hope im not daydreaming.take care god bless.

JCs,JCs n more JCs...

2004-12-23T14:54:00.000-08:00

wow..i just went to the MOE JC directory..saw catholic JC..wow so many affiliated skools!!Here r the affiliated skools:Catholic High,Assumption English,CHIJ Toa Payoh,CHIJ Katong Convent,CHIJ St. Joseph's Convent,CHIJ St. Theresa's Convent,Hai Sing Catholic,Holy Innocents' High,Montfort Sec,St. Anthony's Canossian,St. Gabriel's,St. Joseph's Institution,St. Patrick's,Maris Stella High,CHIJ St. Nicholas Girls'..wow..c the exaggerated bold words?one is my skool..the other is my mum's sec skool last time..:D..haha..i know im not that smart..but i really hope that i'll be more hardworking so i can get in2 1 of the JCs!Noe y i luv JCs so much?Cos there's ARTS Stream..The CCAs have performing Arts n much much more..n it's nice..i say i come frm SJC..pple might think that i come frm a JC...k lame joke..any1 watched Tian Cai go go go yesterday?no1 won!!lol..anyway was quite tough..i think the easiest game is the 1 which evry1 calls "7 up"..anyway hope u watch the show..tho it's late..at 11:30 to 12:55..:P..then tomorrow on channel 62 there's The Stewardess which i watched before..it's a lil scary..at 4:00 PM tomorrow...haiz..sumtimes i wish i were less TIMID..even wen there's a horror show that my mum says isnt scary..i'll find it EXTREMELY scary..i'll immediately bury myself under the covers..hehe..i dunno..if ur laughing now as ur reading this..i dun mind..im really timid..if im in the toilet n i see a creepy crawlie(no matter how small)..even if im about to bathe..i'll hurriedly run as far away as i can from the creepy crawlie..the only insect im not afraid of is the...ANT..hah..im even afraid of LIZARDS...sigh...me very timid..o well..n wen i watch sumthin touching especially sumthin bout animals..if it's touching..i'll shed tears immediately..no joke..does that count as very emotional?o well..cant help it..i cant change the way that i m..tomorrow having TURKEY n HAM!!yay....found out that Cynthia is VERY compatible with Mr T...:P..im not compatible..so now she can stop teasing me:)take care..god bless.
BELOW ARE THE RESULTS OF MY FRIENDS N MY SIGN..
Jolene-Capricorn n me-aries
If there's anyone more direct than Aries, it's Capricorn! Both of them have just got to tell everyone what to do. Aries always wants to move on to the next thing even if she's not finished and Capricorn won't quit until she's done with the last detail. They're both pretty stubborn so their challenge is to figure out ways to get their timing in synch.

Cynthia-Virgo and me
What are the chances that active Aries and fussy Virgo will get along? Aries hates to be bogged down with details while Virgo refuses to take a step unless she knows exactly what's going to happen. Virgo hates bullies and Aries can be pretty bossy. Both of them need to watch what they say to each other if they want the friendship to last. They can be good for each other in an "opposites attract" kind of way.

Wei Xin-Leo and me
Oh boy! Run away when these two get into a fight! Aires and Leo - major Fire and Fire! Both of them are independent, strong, and very competitive. Neither one likes to be a follower. They're actually a good duo if they can figure out a way to respect each other and avoid all the drama. If they want a happy best-friendship, they are going to have to take turns in the spotlight.

Cynthia-Virgo and Jolene-Capricorn
Capricorn and Virgo are both practical and cautious. You may see Cap’s positive attitude perking Virgo up. As bad as things can get, Capricorn is convinced that she can figure out a way to make them better. Virgo really appreciates that Capricorn works as hard as she does, so they make excellent study partners. These two may not move quickly, but they’re always moving forward!

Me and I-mai-aries
The word for an Aries/Aries friendship is dynamic! And challenging! And very competitive! They'll say exactly what they're thinking, which means that things could heat up when they argue. They are two Fire signs after all! The good thing is that they don't stay mad long. Their energy level is awesome - one Aries by herself is incredible and two are just amazing! They'll never get bored because they can always find new things to do together no matter where they are.

Me and Clara-Is her sign sagittarius?
This is a great match! Sure, it's Fire 'n Fire, but they have a lot in common because they both love new adventures and neither one gets all tangled up in the ego thing. Sagittarius likes to map out a plan of action, but if something doesn't work out, Aries will always come up with a new way to do it. They may argue but it's usually over really fast without any hard feelings.

Scorpio and me
This friendship will never be boring with these super strong signs! Aries says "Do it now, fix it later" while Scorpio always wants to check everything over a couple of times. Scorpio can help Aries think things through a little more and Aries can help Scorpio learn not to be quite so intense about everything. They are both leaders - but in different ways. If they find their groove, it might turn into a really deep friendship.

My Christmas n new year resolutions!

2004-12-21T22:32:00.000-08:00

hey everyone..here are my resolutions for year 2005!i will not change them..to do well for every test n exams..be top of 2E..be more polite to everyone..speak better english..do well for all my next 3 years..get to temasek jc..if u c the website..it's the best!!my mum has been looking down on me..so i really havta prove myself..take care god bless

HI!!

2004-12-20T17:50:00.000-08:00

my title for my blog entries are always so boring..hi..sigh..lalala..lol..i dunno..cant think of a nice title:P..i couldnt keep the preivous blog layout cos of n incurable problem..oh well...this is nice in my opinion too..im 60% not looking forward to skool...hmm..everyone will be staring at me n the class im in..no not because im gorgeous..jus because they probably think im a dumbo...all i can look forward to is chinese new year..can put makeup lol..then looking forward to orientation performance..anyway so many happenings for 2004..mostly sad...so i have to try to make my life more happy for 2005!then hope all the bad luck washed away..lol...why m i so superstitious??then hope Miss lee will not call the choir members,including me,on 25 Dec which is christmas..wait my mum angry..wonder if Miss Lee will rem to call my mum on her handfone bout choir practice..cos we're having one more..is for the future sec 1s to enjoy:P..sum pple dunno how 2 enjoy the choir singing..:D..then there's syf..there'll be much more happy stuff going on nxt yer i hope..then i oso hope i'll stop degrading,despising n reprimanding myself..n be more optimistic..i was never optimistic anyway..whenever there are exam or test results..i'll be like aiyah sure fail one..sigh..lol..but if im optimistic i tend to sound PROUD..:o..i really dun enjoy being a pessimist..so unbearable..just hope my 1st common test will be well done..so that i can have much more confidence for the next tests n exams..asian palace rox....cos it's intro clips are so clear..hope it'll have more interesting stuff coming up..it forever rox..losing n interest in classical music..:o..then i think i have grown taller..:D..at least sumthin to be proud of before going to skool n standing nxt to the tall pple..:)May God Bless Yaz alwaexx..:)

sigh

2004-12-19T01:45:00.000-08:00

I really admire LaoPo and Daddy-In-Law...they're so pretty..then so clever..that time weixin n i saw them shopping non-stop with their maams..then u noe what..they still went to a good class..if they stayed at home n studied non-stop..they'll be the top!!sigh..im getting uglier as i get older..my stupid JAW is pointed..those pple who dont know me must be afraid of me now..im always very afraid wen sum1 is walking beside me cos im so afraid to disgrace that person...surely u dun wanna be seen walking with an ugly person?i dunno if i'll ever get "taken" next time..any guy will be embarrassed if they are seen with me...i noe im like "looking down" on myself again..but i cant help it..sigh..my looks will get even worse in future..then i have a big nose n small eyes n pointed JAW..n i have BLACKHEADS n PORES n PIMPLES!!i bet ur very scared of me alredy...o well..i dunno..those pple hu are in the same skool as me..please dun be shocked..i already warned u bout how ugly i m so plz dun b that shocked..o well..since my face is UGLY..i cant change it..i hate plastic surgery..so i'd better control my weight..im short n ugly..yuckx..o well..still..take care.

Hmm

2004-12-18T16:30:00.000-08:00

Today found out that all mp3s online could be deleted soon...cos of that piracy thingy..will be so boring..my blog will have no more online music!HELP!!lol..changed my music to all i want for christmas is you by mariah carey...my taggy's still empty..take care.

:)

2004-12-17T07:36:00.000-08:00

haiz..please don't laugh..but i really admire those ballerinas..sigh..if only i weren't so fat,chubby n short..n probably not that graceful..haiz..anyway..nuthin much to say..bought a bday prezzie today for sum1..with my mum..:P..k.take care.

Sorry..

2004-12-16T07:51:00.000-08:00

hmmm...toked to weixin on the phone today:)..toked aobut lots of stuff as usual..:)...nothing much to write in my blog nowadays...i've changed email n msn acc. so msn acc. err....im deleting those pple hu dun wanna be added..k...tt's all byez..erm...changed it to moxl_91@hotmail.com...so if you are someone i dun noe tt well..like n online pal..if u dun add me..i guess..ur forever deleted..but if u r sum1 i've met..i'll add u myself..k?k take care

AHH

2004-12-15T15:15:00.000-08:00

Haiz...i hope Yan Han is feeling better...cos I HAVE AN AWFUL SORE THROAT!!..haiz...luckily im in the mood for porridge..cosmy mum's probably gonna bring me to a place with PORRIDGE!!..cant wait for christmas..but will hate it wen skool reopens..so disgraceful...bleh.....i dun care if any1 GLARES at me like im a retard..im just doin my stuff well so nxt year i can raise my head up to the sky!jk..anyway..take care.

Er..

2004-12-14T19:15:00.000-08:00

dunno y i keep dreaming about David....even when i'm not thinking about him.......nothing much to post these days..just warning u....im getting VERY fat...so dun b shocked wen u c me in Jan...actually nowadays..i wanna go back to TAF club:D//then can exercise..:)..can join rebecca..YAY!!..frankly,i miss going up the stairs..having 'chops' all over my hand...getting all sweaty..haha..i hate to feel bloated n fat u c..plus my arm is FAT..i think i'll get in2 TAF club wen skool reopens..goodie..:Pcos my mum has sumthin against exercising..sigh..if i ever had a chance i wanna use the gym equipment..especially the running thingy..:Plol..i hate being fat not just for looks..also is a really disgusting feeling for me..k tt's all..take care n god bless.

Oh...

2004-12-09T09:36:00.000-08:00

4:31 PM
I just saw the calendar 2005!My bday is on a fri,good fri!!o my...haiz..no prezzie frm frenz..but nvm..dun care about prezzies..as long as sum pple wish me happy bday..i'll b smilin all day long!lol...public holiday is my bday..mayb can celebrate wif my family..:)..
Haiz..my mum's always so unfair..never clarify things..then *PIAK!*...i got study HARD n the whole day yesterday..n she sed i PLAYED whole day...accused for nothing..she can b so SCARY sumtimes..

Yay!

2004-12-08T05:04:00.000-08:00

Yay!!!!!!!my hair's like last time,not so dry becoming smooth again!!n my skin is better..thnx to the soap n shampoo...:)..so happy..nuthin much to say...jus now toked to weixin bout sing idol n stuff..so funny..haiz..wonder if we can still eat with each during recess.n walk home together after skool..sigh..god bless n take care..

Lalala...

2004-12-07T00:24:00.000-08:00

Went to Chinatown..there was one inconsiderate man who just sat at the same table as us..there were so many empty seats available nearby..o well..we ate claypot rice..shiok!:)..went to buy shampoo n shower foam..bought pantene..the one i had was for Volume or sumthin..this time bought the 1 for dry hair..:)..then bought the green tea scrub..kinda gud n cheap:P..im gonna call lisais n weixin(tho i'm afraid of her bro..lol)tomorrow..haiz..lisais leaving so soon..hope shell be back sooner..my hair's growing fast!!yay..still rem last time wen my hair was so short..wen i tied 1 ponytail..the rubberband would come off automatically..lol..lotsa work to do tomorrow..getting up at 7..muz do maths,eng,history assessment..whew!!did eng assessment..maths 1 will be VERY challenging..god bless n take carez..

....

2004-12-06T02:07:00.000-08:00

I really am an idol of Avril Lavigne,Ashlee Simpson..but so am i one of Deng Li Jun,Zhang Fei and Fei Yu Qing!...dun blame me for being old-fashioned...i juz luv..their voices..so sweet..i mean deng li jun's:P..im gonna place sum deng li jun's songs these days n midis of course..so if u are all bout style,plz dun turn on the vol..:Pgod bless take carez

AHHH

2004-12-03T23:19:00.000-08:00

So what if Sylvester isnt the Singapore Idol?He did very well in the Final Show:)I love his version of I Dream...waiting to download it..my hair's so dry...:(my Pantene Shampoo cant help!!Oh no..any nice shampoo to recommend anyone?hair loss..for my mum..or dry hair for me..??cos i heard pple say that Dove is good but others say that it causes dandruff..then my mum sez organics too oily..really dunno wat shampoo's gud..my hair SUX..U c it's DARN bushy..even wen i thinned it down..lol..I watched the Triumph in the skies show..last night...was really nice..lots of fate involved as usual..Lisais..if ur reading this..What's ur handfone no. again?sorry for asking...cos i cant contact u on ur home fone..n i also cant contact Cynthia..cant contact any1!!!frustrating..like they cant contact me..so no1 can ocntact each other!lol..last night couldnt sleep as always i slept at 3 or 4..then i dreamt that my mum beat me with the cane..so scary..then was losing lots of blood..so many nightmares these days..then i also went for choir..keep having prob holding the LONG notes..n the high 1s sumtimes cant reach..Miss Lee dyed her hair!..cool..then at least now she doesnt wear those ugly long skirts..lol...she sed we could be having a choir practice on the last few days of Dec!:o..probably for orientation..so far we only practised 2 songs for orientation..im not really sure the amt of songs we're gonna sing..then choir always rox..no matter how tempting npcc or st johns or dance club is for pple to join..CHOIr forever is the best cca..rocking sjc..so for those future sec 1s..i hope they wont hesitate to join choir..plus our banner's probably the nicest..lol..i hao lian..though im forever a loner in a choir..it's the only cca suited for me..plus the conductor rox..she's so like a comedian yet can b serious..so dun laugh at choir..we dun jus sing,sing sing..at least our choir most guai cca..:P..k..bye.

NIGHTMARE!!

2004-12-02T21:25:00.000-08:00

whoa..had a nightmare..i dreamt that there was sum test at the beginning of sec 2 determining our class in sec 3..i went to 3E!!!so scary.....................................i think god is asking me to keep working hard....i MUST..i dun wanna go to 3E!no thanks..

hmmm

2004-12-01T06:30:00.000-08:00

went to seoul garden with my parents..wow...the barbequed food was GREAT!Absolutely AWESOME!!then ate lotsa fruits then the chocolate chip ice cream was the best!!YUMMY..later there's singapore idol!!i think the songs tt sylvester is gonna sing tonight is nicer than taufik..hope sylvester doesnt let his fans down..i really hope he'll win:P..he's singing an jing n it's my life..then taufik singing superstition n sumthin else..n they hav new compositions of songs...cool..wow..sum pple even turned up at the stadium last night...:o..fri's last day of choir for this year 2004:(will miss choir..o well..take care god bless..n btw if u want me 2 place any bakground music for my blog..i mean..if u wanna request ur fav song to be put up on my blog..u can..:)..rite now..gonna put up the chinese TVB songs.:)my mum oso sed mayb nxt time sec 3 can transfer me to her ex school st anthony's canossian..ooh..is at bedok...k.....

Ok...

2004-11-30T01:32:00.000-08:00

Wish sum pple will be more serious..i mean it's ok to be funny..but not about EVERY single thing..n sum pple r too obsessed with love......finally bought the school books..lit. book will change so only can buy that when school reopens..sci bk,the other lit. bk kinda interesting:Pd&t still sux:(:(...then hist is frm last year's history of s'pore bk!shud hav geog i think..lit is kinda complicated..very...lit like:Plol..then maths so complicated..at least most of it my dad noes very well..i'll ask him:P

sigh

2004-11-29T07:19:00.000-08:00

really really really HATE myself...i cant even say one word,two-syllables "sorry"...who do i think i am to have pple forgive me without me apologising?then im so blur..i really hate myself..tomorrow if u c me in pe shirt n jeans or sumthin...dun laugh.....cant tell u reason but jus dun laugh,k?anyway..i dunno if im suffering frm depression..sumtimes i get so happy..sumtimes i feel so sad..sumtimes i cant seem to tell my feelings.....i am weird...then my parents seem to hav sumthin against lawyers mayb cos they were once almost bankrupt..i dunno..but i still wanna b a lawyer...no matter wat they say..we'll c...not sure wat my job will be..but 1 thing im very sure of is that im going to 3H..i mean..i MUST go 3H..i dun wanna b stuck in a horrid class..nxt yer..i dun care if im gonna b the no. 1 loner..i jus hav to be the no. 1 person in terms of results..dun blame me for being too obsessed with success..k...god bless n take care

oH

2004-11-28T11:38:00.000-08:00

yesterday..i happened to check the dict. then under 1 word..i found out that my birthday is actually the day when the Virgin Mary adopted her son Jesus Christ!Then i asked my mum..she said that it's not accurate..cos hers was an operation..not natural birth..the date was supposed to be on 26 March..but she changed it to 25 March...but still..i came out on 25 march right?:Dso at least there's some kind of fate involved here..lol...god bless n take carez..updated the blog music todaex..is daphne khoo's im your angel..enjoy:P
8:57 PM
went to white sands instead of airport..mayb tomorrow going airport..went to sportslink..but the school shoes either cheap n not nice..or too expensive..o well..then the watch shop also..so expensive..wow..1 watch cost $700 plus!my..the library there forever rox!!borrowed many nice bks..then,went to the pasar malam near punggol field..parents bought putu mayam..no not a fool..is sum thing that looks like bee hoon...then u add sugar n coconut to it..kinda nice...then bought goreng pisang..n tutu kueh!YUMYUM!..k take care byez..god bless..

mmm...

2004-11-27T12:50:00.000-08:00

The flushing thingy of the toilet bowl got stuck AGAIN!!..some serious problem..eating yummy hotcakes..mmm...nice....feel so bad..go bad class...my dad still buys me good food..n my mum buys me new stuff
8:49 PM
Just went to Jalan Kayu to eat prata and briyani..wow,got mutton n chicken..very shiok...we had 2 wait for quite a long time..about 15 min i think..at first was v. tired..then after eating the hot curry n stuff...wah..shiok..then suddenly became rejuvenized..sorry again for my broken eng...when told that there was an even hotter curry than tt...i was so shocked!then we bought sum jumbeduk?i dunno how to spell..but is sum crispy jackfruit thingy..can even eat the seed..at the pasar malam..near my ex-place..punggol field..tomorrow going to airport termina 1..no im not going overseas..lol..going to eat food lah..k..god bless n take care

Must I DO well to get friends?

2004-11-26T12:30:00.000-08:00

Sigh.Here I am frustrated again after feeling happy for some time.Must I really have friends when I do well,and when I fail,they treat me coldly.Take for example,her,she has been my classmate since primary four until now.Then,when I said "hello" and smile at her as usual,she looks at me coldly and said "hi".Her glare was really like a frozen iceberg.Now,I realise everyone is trying HARD to be my friend when they realise that I have failed.Cmon people,if you don't want to be my friend,just say it,k?If yo find it so hard to smile and talk to me,then don't do it,k?I really can't stand your pretence.And,some of you even smirk at me,pretending to be smiling.I can tell from your faces that you are actually saying this,"Hah!This girl is the last of the class.So dumb.Luckily,I'm not like her!"How would you feel if you smile at everyone and say "hi" when you know that no one actually is your friend and others look at you as if you are so stupid,and they don't want to be seen with you??Do you mean that there is no such thing as friendship?Even those who have hugged me on the last day of school,I can really see your expression.So reluctant,as if I'm the biggest fool in the world.So angry,frustrated,sad,hurt that I wonder if I can cope today in choir.The more you guys look down on me,the more I'll prove to you that I'm not the biggest fool,YOU are.You know who I'm talking about.Friends are never forever.When I do well,everybody will be nice to me.When I don't do well,or if i have some flaws in my character,everyone glares,stares,and like a trumpet,they BLARE loudly at me,or rather insult me in their hearts.Quit all that pretence.I can take it better if you just say you hate me.I don't want you to pretend to be my friend.Why don't you just be friends with my BRAIN?Since you like it when it's smart...

Whew!

2004-11-24T21:30:00.000-08:00

Just read the "mind your body" newspaper.Wow,Botox is not so good after all.The effects only last three to six months.Whew!And the top pupil from Sengkang Pri,got 285!OH MY..then his parents said dun need to ask him to study,must ask him to stop some more!So guai 1...i jealous...:)my mum bought new bag yesterday..is much lighter than my previous bag..quite nice..Choir's tomorrow..nxt mon,no choir then fri is last day of choir.SIGH!Take carez..god bless.

What can I say?

2004-11-24T02:36:00.000-08:00

Hmm...nowadays I'm writing in those cursive handwriting..hmm...so fickle-minded about handwriting:D..compass point's so nice..lots of decorations..i luv the christmas trees!:P..my mum gave me a new pair of shoes n a watch which i'll be wearing when school reopens!!yay...then,it seems nowadays we keep supporting breadtalk..as if we're that rich..lol..starting to gain confidence about myself..keep telling myself not to give up and you know..ya...have to prove to everyone..that a stupid person can be clever again..hehe..i luv classical music..if u tell me u find it boring i can understand i guess..but my life's music,music nothing but music..but i don';t wanna be a singer..just lawyer...but i don't want to be court lawyer..i dunno what lawyer?we'll see..still haven't sec 2 i'm already thinking about getting a job..lol..pardon my broken-up english..it's all messed-up..like my hair..though i have to work hard on improving on my work..i still have to improve my looks 2..hey..i'm a girl you know..:P..my hair..is..one word..UGLY..i just need some clips i guess..friday i should be buying clips..my parents support BreadTalk and I support the school bookshop.Hey,it rhymes!!!Then,I updated my blog, and I change my blogskin often,usually to suit whatever mood i have..but if people keep seeing the same blog too often,they will probably stop going to the blog..so that's why i keep changing it..a few weeks from now,should be changing it to a christmas blog..with beautiful christmas music..those who love chinese music..sorry..cos my blog NEVER EVER has chinese music..it's always english music..or just classical..cos i dun really like chinese music nowadays..eng music has more meaning for me:P..surprising that sylvester got in singapore idol..though i seriously want him to be the idol..i still think he lacks the talent that taufik now has..anyway even if sylvester isn't the idol..he should be able to be famous in the chinese market..i think that's all....k..take care y'all..god bless u.

Busy Days...

2004-11-22T12:14:00.000-08:00

On Saturday,went to HarbourFront..then went to Singapore Poly..the restaurant's called Food Haven I think...then we heard the song Perfect cos sum guys were playing it..so i downloaded it n it's my bg music!:)..i luv it..nice..going to skool for choir..need to buy 1 blue,1 black pen....luv choir..practising the orientation songs..YES!!!then on Sunday,which is yesterday we took 119 to sumwhere in Hougang..:P..tt's all i guess..k..take care.

wOw...

2004-11-19T11:51:00.000-08:00

MY CHATTERBOX HAS A SCARY PROB.!!!EVERYTIME I TYPE A FEW WORDS IT AUTOMATICALLY SUBMITS IT!SO SCARY........................

Boy..I can't wait...On the 1st or 2nd week of Jan,there'll be a choir concert for the orientation..we're gonna sing 3-5 songs...all very nice:Pwait till u hear them..today we made our stomachs HARD..lol..then i partnered another girl..actually she partnered me..then is like i dunno her well..so kinda paiseh..u noe..but still..we did sum exercise like the partner must put her fist at ur stomach then u hiss out..aiyah cant explain..lots of performances coming up..our choir only got a few sec 3s..mostly sec1 n sec2..but i think our conductor's great cos she's trained us so hard..then our voices are louder n nicer now..:D1 of the songs not nice..i dun tell u which 1..u go n watch nxt year:)...so fun..orientation..syf..we'll b performing in the hall..YEAH!gud beginning to a new year:)i dunno if im going for the camp..maybe if i make frenz ill go:P..hehe..lalala..darn happy now nuthin can make me sad..i feel GREAT...SayonaraZ....

CrAmPs..

2004-11-18T13:38:00.000-08:00

Just got back from choir practice..we finished all 3 songs.YES..
There is supposed to be sum day camp for us..but i dont think
i can even bring myself to walk to the lift,not to say walk to school.
The day camp is 5 hrs,how am i going to stand it??So painful.I feel
like vomiting,but cant vomit,feel like going toilet but cant go......i dunno
how i manage to type my blog entry now.i saw LTC campers today.
Then when we went for sectionals,we saw Mr Arman in a classrm
showing sum pupils sum war video.We had sectionalss in the music rm.
Then,people were being nice to me by saying hi n toking to me.But,I
guess I was sulking.Sigh.If i go on like that,i'm really gonna b a loner
in choir.Ow!The pain's back...........................................................I
can't believe I managed to control all that pain for 4 to 5 hours.And I
could even sing loudly.PAINPAINPAIN.....im having that vomiting
feeling again..but cant vomit!:(so miserable.....more miserable than last
time i got cramps.The last time,I had weixin to talk to.Now..............
!!!!!!!god bless u...

HIII

2004-11-18T05:24:00.000-08:00

I feel good...ta da da da da da da..:P..now feel better...i mean my stomach cramp..like gone already..thnx to the hot coffee..then..toked to weixin for 20 min plus(or more?)dunno..we talked about too many things..like about nxt yer..s'pore idol..bout many things..then we're both bored:P..CYNTHIA tagged!!!YAYYYYYYYYY..so happy...i want to call her leh..still rem last time evrytime call n call her..disturb her:P....aiyah..u wont noe how i feel...hen xiang cynthia leh!!!!!!wonder how she's progressing wif her "lover"(?)..then i downloaded many mp3s..until headache..lol..aiyah..the reason i hang up the fone is cos of a very big secret..i cant tell u all..it's that BIG..:P...but it's really a reason..i'm not hanging up my fone on purpose..anyway..call me between 3 to 6 only..plz..i miss cynthia.:P..nevr get to tok 2 her wen she went for npcc..sigh.........aiyah..we didnt really tok much.....but after all..SHE's the one hu let me cry on her shoulder...the ONE hu relieved me frm boredom last time..the ONE hu was the funniest..n a very gud fren:P
6:04PM
post again:Pnow,eating hot porridge..pork porridge with egg..mm..
7:30 PM
just saw the advert on channel 8.There's one CD called Love Songs.I don't think I wanna buy it.Though is nice.Cos I have all the mp3s of the songs:Pthen all of them r my blog's music..especially the present 1:Dbut if any1 buys can lend 2 me:Phehe...
8:52 PM
just watched singapore idol..taufik's performance damn GOOODDD!!He's obvously in top 2..if he dun get in..it's probably because of racism..olinda oso sang well..but syl:(sang TERRIBLY...:'(But Oli..the looks prob only..if not she definitely can ocmpete wif Taufik to be s'pore idol...sigh..wats rong wif syl 2day??:'(
9:36 PM
so disappointed again cos syl most likely getting out..erm..my dad's singing sum old songs i dunno behind me on the sofa:D:D..sigh dun post blog entries liao..gotta practise choir songs..muz memorise all 2mrrw!!ahh...take care

Freedom

2004-11-17T09:30:00.000-08:00

Today,it's such a bright,sunny morning
that is blinding my eyes.Many fluffy,white
clouds,floating in the sky,with birds chirping
happily in their nest.:DAm I writing a composition
or what?Yesterday,I went with my mum to Tampines.
Shopping and the works.We went to Tampines Regional
Library.Borrowed four THICK books,including one anatomy
book(something about the human body)sumthin for dummies..
:PI'm a dummy...erm..tomorrow,there'll be choir from 9 to 5.
Too bad there is no npcc.Can't "visit" Jolene and Cynthia.
Maybe Band and Guitar Club going tomorrow.Then,it won't
be too quiet for us,choir.Next week,Monday,I'm going to get
the textbooks and exercide books for next year.Hurray!!
Looking at the Compass Point booklet I found outside my
house.Wow!So many Christmas stuff to buy.All that KFC
food.Haha!:PToday,I am the girl of the house!at least for
a few hrs:)My mum just went out,dad's working.

*~ God Bless You and May Angels Protect You
From Harm Always ~*

Dewdrops accompany me as I wait for u..

Hurt.Misunderstood.

haiz.

Sorry

sorrows n more sorrows evryday...

SHUT UP

oh man...

-hyperactivity-

"mathilda"

loneliness...

LIFE SUX...

:'(:'(:'(:"(-DEDICATED TO J,P n L

survived...

You still turn me on...

having 2nd thoughts...

giv me ur hand...

I wonder if u ever think of me....

SIGH**

Aiya.....

how can u jus walk away frm me??

lalala~

SIGH

OhMyGoodness...

HAIZ

HAIZ

HAIZ

HAIZ

:D

dum-dee-dum...

Haiz.

Stagefright.

Just an ordinary day.

:S

....

Depressed.

YAWNs...

Realization.

Nice quiz I took:)

Yawns

:):):):):):)

:o

SOOOOOOOOO HAPPY!

AMBITIOUS

:o

....

YEAH!

:P

................................................................

PUKEX~

:))))

..........

..........

i'll do what it takes till i touch the sky!

SPH

Busy...

*PANT*

..

........

OMG!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMY!!!!

Three Cheers for camp!!!

:

...........

C'mon Let's Pray!!!

Wooo

:(

yay

JOLENE

:'(

Ms/Madam Tan Cheo Tee??

SIGH

MY RECORDINGS:)

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

JCs,JCs n more JCs...

My Christmas n new year resolutions!

HI!!

sigh

Hmm

:)

Sorry..

PANT